Lord knows it would be the first time

[sirona_fics]

I feel so sad, so emotionally exhausted today, and it's all gyzym's fault, her and pressed against the pending physics of my passed down last name. It's so heartbreakingly beautiful that it made me curl up in a ball of contentment and abject hopelessness and resignation and longing -- not a natural born combination, I know.

It's just -- back when this whole thing started (god, I'm making it sound as if the Arthur/Eames fandom has been going on for years, when it didn't really exist before June), I remember syrraki saying she didn't like it, because all fandom really wants is Arthur and Eames having sex with each other. And okay, there's a lot of that, I'm not going to lie, and there's nothing wrong with that at all, we'd be hypocrites to complain about it. This story, though, this story is so damned powerful that I don't think anyone could say that the Arthur/Eames fandom is just about the sex after they read it.

No other fandom has made me crave having a significant other like this one has. And okay, this is in part a rather self-indulgent, whiny post, but jesus, I read this last night and I could cry, because I trully, really don't believe anyone will ever love me in my life the way Arthur loves Eames in that story; I just can't even articulate the magnitute of that feeling, and believe me, I've been trying for the past half hour. It's not even a particularly happy story, it deals with some very powerful personal issues, but it's still beyond anything I've ever read, and I don't know why it's affecting me this much, but I just can't stop thinking about it. Sometimes it's not the moments when we're happy, but the times when we are unbearably sad and close to breaking that are the most romantic of all.

I've tried cheering myself up by reading happy, fluffy fics, but I think the effect this story had on me is going to be a lot longer-lasting than just over the time it took me to read it. I mean, come on, I'm breaking out The Smiths -- this story is staying. No wonder Arthur/Eames is becoming my primary fandom of late; the overall quality of the writing is beyond anything I've ever encountered. I find myself doubtful that I'm ever going to purchase another romance novel in my life; the stories this fandom ekes out with astounding regularity make published romance literature somewhat obsolete for me.

Comments

[zolac-no-miko.livejournal.com]

...Wow. Guess I'm going to have to read that. @_@

[loobeeinthesky.livejournal.com]

Oh I read that fic and adored it, the personal issues I can relate to and it made me wish i'd had my own Arthur to be there when I went through the same thing. It is a powerful feeling.

I feel the same about that fandom, I thought I wouldn't get sucked in and would drift like I normally do, but I'm still here and loving it so much. Most say it's the sex but like you say it's that whole finding your significant other, and they may be chalk and cheese but damn me if it's doesn't tatse good (only E'A would make me say a daft thing like that *rolls eyes*) And hell the fic kills me dead every time, people are so amazing and talented ♥

[altri-uccelli.livejournal.com]

I read gyzym's whole series last week and think I know what you mean. The one that really affected me deeply was 'life long foreigner,' I think because interactions with my family are also filled with unspoken (and spoken) disappointment and disapproval, and the way Eames was so outraged for Arthur, the way he was so utterly on his side, really really touched me.

I stopped by here having just read your reply to my h/d travel fair comment, and am friending, if you don't mind. I'm also getting intensely drawn into Inception fandom and am kind of flabbergasted by the quality of the writing (also the volume, which is why it's nice to have a flist talking about the must-reads; otherwise it's quite overwhelming).