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sirona_ficsSpace Piracy: Lessons in Love, Ass-Kicking, and Instant Noodles, Part One
Part Two
"Sakura-chan! I'm home!"
He gets a thump to the back of his head for his troubles.
"I can't believe you agreed to have more people on this ship! This lot is enough!"
"C'mon, Sakura-chan, I couldn't leave them stranded, could I? We need more people, you know that." Nearly a quarter of Soragakure's crew was left at Hoshii. That's a greater loss than Naruto or Sakura had expected; limitations on space and food supply be damned, they really could use the extra help.
Sakura folds her arms and glares at Sasuke. He is dirty, and sweaty, and dusty from all the running, and Sakura wants to lick him. Sasuke narrows his eyes back at her.
"Can you neanderthals tell me where I can wash? And it would be really nice to see a bed sometime today." His head is still blurry and he really needs to lie down before he collapses right in front of the enemy. Sakura looks at him for a moment, deciding whether she cares enough; apparently her irritation wins out and she exhales heavily.
"Naruto, show him to D549. I've had Jiraiya clean it up and take off the antibacterial sheets on the furniture."
Naruto splutters. "But that's right next door to me! I don't want Princess that close! A captain needs his privacy!"
It only earns him another whack on his head.
"Fine. Come along, you," he grumbles and leads the way out of the mess hall. Sasuke grabs a sandwich off of the plate on the nearest table and tries to walk out sedately behind Naruto, with limited success. He can feel his knees starting to give already. Why did he let himself get this exhausted? He is absolutely NOTfainting collapsing in front of Naruto.
They make it to his designated sleeping space with minimum interruption, which for Naruto means being stopped at least twice by various crew members to say "hi" or be congratulated on his escape. At least it gives him the chance to munch his sandwich away. Finally they get to the right door before Sasuke makes a fool of himself all over the floor. He realizes he is already making enough of a fool of himself when he catches himself ogling said idiot's broad shoulders and toned ass that are walking ever so close in front of him, getting even closer as they stop in front of the door...
Sasuke trips and slams full-body into Naruto's back, grunting at the impact. He can smell musk, and sweat, and soap, and something he's not entirely sure of, but which has an extremely vivid effect on his nether regions. Naruto flattens himself to the wall, taking Sasuke's weight, a surprised 'oomph' escaping as he is winded by the blow. Sasuke is horrified when all he can feel is smooth, hard muscle beneath the thin jumpsuit. Not. Good. He must be more exhausted than he thought if he's getting turned on by the blond moron. The extremely fit blond moron... Shut up, libido!
He pushes away as fast as his shaking legs allow, muttering a quick 'sorry'.
"That's okay," Naruto tells him, still breathing harder than normal. "The code is 549800. The bathroom is just down the hall to the right there, D546, there's a shower sign on the door... Well, you can find your way around. If you need anything I'm right next door, okay? Okay. Goodnight then."
Sasuke grunts, barely able to focus on anything but Naruto's moving lips. He twitches uncomfortably and practically falls into his room when Naruto keys the door open.
"Are you alright?" Naruto wants to know, concerned with Sasuke's lack of balance.
"'M fine," Sasuke slurs, suddenly absolutely exhausted and unable to keep up his pretense. "Just need a shower and then I can sleep."
"Don't be ridiculous, you can't have a shower when you're this out of it, you'll slip and crack your head or something. Have one when you wake up in a few hours."
"But I'm disgusting," Sasuke points out; to his horror it comes out more like a child's whine.
Naruto smirks. "Well, I can't let you go in the shower alone in this condition, and I'm not going in there with you... unless you ask very nicely."
Sasuke recovers enough to glower darkly at him. "Fuck off," he tells him and passes out across the perfectly made bed.
---
Sasuke enters the dining hall the next morning smelling of cheap, probably stolen shampoo and high-quality, definitely stolen soap. Naruto is nowhere to be found, but he is the captain and there is no reason for him to be mingling with the crew when he could be captaining his ship.
The breakfast line is gone, but the crew's still mostly-present, seated at tables scattered about the room. Sasuke can't remember most of the crew's names--Nara Something, related to the clan head who had winked at Sasuke yesterday sat with the blonde... whatever-her-name-was, and a larger teen, both of whom are likely related to two more of the clan heads from yesterday.
Sasuke grabs a plate, placing an apple and a bagel on it. He glances over his shoulder, wondering if any of the crew will notice or care if he went into the kitchen to scavenge for a few tomatoes.
After a few seconds' debate with himself, Sasuke vetoes the idea. The apples aren't quite fresh, and tomatoes are a rarity. They would surely be in the food if there were any available.
Sasuke takes a seat at an empty table, away from the rest of the crew. Sakura takes a seat across from him, moments later. "Kakashi tells me you have a friend with nanomachines."
Sasuke looks up. He grunts his agreement, taking a bite out of his bagel.
"So. Where is this person?" Sakura asks.
Sasuke waits until he finishes chewing to reply, "Karin is currently about half a lightyear away. Zabuza and his companion said they would bring my crew back here. It will probably take a few days."
Sakura frowns, raising one eyebrow. "You... don't know much about Hoshii's ship work, do you?"
"What?" Sasuke takes another bite of his bagel, chewing slowly. "One half of a lightyear--if you've got a particularly good warp drive, it will take just under two days."
Sakura laughs. "We don't have any particularly good ships," she purrs. "We have customized ships, built by pirates like Zabuza and Haku who make their living by outrunning the rest of the universe. The estimated time for half a lightyear, round trip, is twelve hours. You've slept for eleven."
---
Naruto stumbles out of the second cold shower he's had to take today. One was due to hot, sweaty weapons practice with Kiba. The other was... not. It was that pretty bastard's fault. Pretty much everything had been for the past few days. Why did he have to go and be all... Sasuke-ish? He huffs a lungful of steamy air in irritation.
"Captain, your presence is required on deck," Jiraiya says, and Naruto instantly dislikes this new, more formal side of him that the Incident (capital "I") unlocked.
"On my way," he says loud enough for the microphone to pick his voice up twice over. The ship with Sasuke's crew must have arrived. "Hey, Jiraiya, how long until we reach the Whirlpool crash site?"
"About six hours, give or take a bit."
Right. So he only has to put up with the impostors for six hours at worst. He is curious, true, and they did sound awesome, but as the captain of a ship and having the well-being of ten crewmembers to look out for, it's a different bowl of ramen altogether.
He makes it to the bridge just as Kakashi is coming up as well, Iruka striding swiftly beside his slouching figure.
"Status?" Kakashi barks.
"Haku and Zabuza have landed and the passengers are disembarking into the cargo bay. There are five life signs at present; Haku and Zabuza are confirmed to be among them."
"All right," Kakashi addresses the gathered crew members. "We're going to go down there nice and calm, relieve the three strangers of their weapons, and offer them some tea. Understood?"
A chorus of grunts is his answer and everyone troops out of the door towards cargo bay. When they get there they pour out and circle the three unknown characters, taking in their bizarre appearances. Having Sakura on their ship has inured them to weird coloring, but the bright blue hair is a surprise even to those most used to the strangeness.
Naruto shoulders his way to the front. "I'm Uzumaki Naruto, captain of the Soragakure. Welcome to the ship. You'll understand, I hope, that we have to run some weapons checks on you before we allow you free run of the vessel. Sasuke, you have five minutes before we take them away for debriefing. Iruka--take away their weapons, please."
A handful of crew members stay nearby just in case something goes horribly awry, but only Sasuke and Naruto stand near enough to Sasuke's crew to be in any potential danger.
Iruka steps forward to the tallest one first. "Hello, and welcome to the Soragakure," he says pleasantly. "My name is Umino Iruka. Please hand over any weapons that may be in your possession. You may have them back after we have confirmed your loyalties; this is just a safety precaution."
The first crew member turns out his pockets. "I fight hand-to-hand, mostly," he explains. "My name is Juugo, nice to meet you."
Iruka shakes his hand, smiling back. He waves a metal detector over Juugo. "You're clear!"
The next stranger looks sullen. He scowls at Iruka. "Zabuza already got mine," he says.
"Mine, actually," Zabuza corrects, leaning on an even larger sword than the one from yesterday. The position of the drooping mask over his face suggests a wide grin.
Iruka swipes him with the metal detector before waving him on. The last is Karin, he presumes. "Hello," Iruka says, smiling. He always hates these procedures; they alienate strangers. On the other hand, it would be stupid not to do them, so he does.
Karin gives a forced smile. "I don't fight, if I can help it," she explains. "I'm a medic."
Iruka nods, waving the metal detector over her. It goes wild.
"Nanomachines," Sasuke explains.
Naruto grins. "She'll need to be strip-searched."
Karin sputters, before focusing on Sasuke with a dirty leer. "But, you trust Sasuke, right? He can give me a strip-search. Then I wouldn't feel embarrassed by exposing myself to strangers." She looks hopefully at Iruka, biting her lip and batting her eyelashes. The sheer range of emotion she goes through in so little time astounds Naruto.
"Procedure," Iruka says with a darkening blush, "dictates that a trusted, female crew member does the deed, so as not to risk sexual harassment. Sakura-chan?"
Karin looks immediately put-out. Sasuke appears almost relieved, but maybe that's just relief at the safe return of his crew members that Naruto is seeing.
Sakura steps forward, her cheeks pink like her hair. "Really?" she deadpans.
Iruka nods, unable to meet hers or Karin's eyes.
Naruto snickers. "We'll see you both in a minute, then, right?"
---
Sakura returns, even redder in the face than ten minutes ago. Naruto takes one look at her and bursts out laughing, bent in two and almost falling over with the effort. Sakura strides straight past him, knocking him in the ribs hard when she comes near. Naruto lets out a loud "oof" and falls over, still laughing his head off. "Does the carpet match the curtains?" he wheezes and disolves in guffaws again, rolling over on his back facing the ceiling. Sasuke watches him, amused and embarassed in equal parts though he's rather eat sand than show the latter.
Sakura stops. Everyone around her freezes, suddenly incredibly wary of her temper. She turns in place very, very slowly, to face Naruto again. The idiot is still giggling, completely unaware of the danger he's placing himself in. At the sudden absence of sound the laughter trails off bit by bit; he turns over on his stomach and looks at Sakura, who practically has steam coming off the top of her head. At the sight Naruto finally comes to his senses; he stares at her for a few more seconds before getting up ungracefully and dusting himself off with faked nonchalance. Sakura starts growling; Naruto takes that as his cue to leg it.
"No, no, please! Eheheh! You know I was only kidding, Sakura-chan! Help!"
Sakura runs after him with single-minded determination. The rest of the crew shake their heads at them, too used to this to even comment. Karin chooses this moment to come back in, adjusting several straps and buckles on her uniform.
"Er, sorry about that," Iruka scratches at the back of his head and sighs. "Shall we?" He leads them out of the cargo bay and into the mess hall to wait for Kakashi's orders and to arrange the interview places.
---
"I assure you, I am being entirely honest; I stay with Sasuke because he can reign me in, in case my bloodlust gets out of hand. I am fully loyal to him. If he is in turn loyal to you, they you have my word I will fight with you and abide by your laws."
"Thank you, Juugo." Kakashi stands and moves on to the next one. "Suigetsu. You know what? I'll spare you the recounter of everything you've done. My question to you is this: can you follow Hoshii's orders, or can you not?"
"Maaan, this is so boring. I hack into shit. That's what I do. You want a ship taken over--great. Just don't tell me I can't do this or I can't do that. I'm my own man."
Kakashi just looks at him.
Suigetsu blows out a puff of air. "Fine. Yes, I'll lake your orders--as long as you station me with Zabuza. There's a few tricks I want to blackmail him into teaching me. Plus, he has my sword and I'm not going to stay away from my baby."
"He says it's his sword."
"Hey, I looted it fair and square! If he's passed out in a bar, he can't complain that his stuff gets taken, now can he? Anyway, I'm gonna win it back from him."
Kakashi scratches his head and decides that's as good as they're going to get from Suigetsu. "Welcome to the crew," he says, not unkindly. "Go find Zabuza, bug him to brief you. Tell him you're part of his crew now. I'm sure he'll just love that!"
Suigetsu grins, showing teeth sharper than is strictly natural. "Fantastic!" he yelps and is gone in a swirl of blue and white. Kakashi smirks. He should get a most entertaining visit tonight.
For now--the last one, and the most valuable in his opinion.
"Karin," he says. "It is to our understanding that you have valuable medical knowledge."
Karin holds his gaze. She does not respond.
"The cost of staying on this ship will be for you to share this knowledge with our medic. Is this acceptable?"
Karin raises an eyebrow. "What, no bullshit about how I should obey Hoshii's orders?"
Kakashi smiles under his mask. "You'll be working with Sakura. I don't believe you'll have a choice."
Karin narrows her eyes. "Right."
---
At lunch, Sasuke's crew gathers around Sasuke. Naruto and Sakura take seats at the same table. There is a brief staring match between Sakura and Karin before the conversation picks up.
"So," Naruto says. "Working with Zabuza and Haku. How did that go?"
Suigetsu sneers. "Miserably."
"You know, when Zabuza starts getting handsy with Haku, that's just a method of keeping people away. He probably figures you'll give them their space." Naruto takes a sip of the canned... he's-not-sure-what juice. They're down to the questionably-flavored liquids; they need to make another hit for food and water, preferably soon.
Suigetsu frowns, clearly thinking this over. "So, if I ignore him...?"
"It'll get worse," Naruto admits. "But then he'll get annoyed and nine times out of ten, he'll give you what you want just to make you shut up. It's foolproof."
---
"How much longer?" Naruto yammers, terribly antsy and wanting to land already. The wreck is bound to have some canned food supplies left over, and he is desperate at this point. They are scheduled to come up to the Whirlpool crash site any minute now--Jiraiya is already slowing Soragakure down to intercept the orbit. The Power of Youth, and Naruto has absolutely no idea how someone could come up with such cringeworthy name and actually mean it, because Gai did, is already waiting at the rendezvous point just a couple hundred miles off the crashed ship.
"Jiraiya, set us down and open a communication channel to the... fuck, I'm not calling it that, I might vomit if I have to say it again; to Gai's ship."
"Comms open; go ahead, captain."
"We're setting down now, Gai, can you come in, too? Haku wants to have a go at your ship so you don't embarass us in front of the Suna crowd."
"Of course, Naruto! And may I say it is a singular pleasure to hear your youthful and energetic voice again? I have longed for many months for our next meet, when I could get the chance to quiz you on your always present exuberance--"
"Hello to you, too, Gai," Naruto sighs in defeat. No matter how many times he wants to go straight to business, it never quite works. "We'll have no more than three hours, tops. Okay? This wreck is not exactly in the most hidden of places; in fact, the wreckage is very close to intersecting with a major pirating route. There will be others apart from us after it. It's a good thing that we've got the fastest ships around, or someone would have already torn this place up ages ago. We've got to be in and out as quick as possible."
"Okay! It is just as you say, young captain, and may I say that it honors you to think so far ahead, and be so concerned for the safety of your crew--"
"Yes, Gai. See you in a minute, then." He turns around to face the others waiting for his signal.
"Everyone! Let's go! Three hours tops, remember? Iruka, would you brief the crew that's just now catching up? Then rip this ship apart, alright, guys?"
A thunderous roar greets his words; Naruto is always amazed that such an imposing sound can be projected by merely three mouths. Then again, if they are Kiba, Ino, and Choji, nothing can surprise him. Sai's wordless agreement is drowned out, but Sai doesn't count; the moment Sai starts yelling it'll be time to run from the end of the known universe.
---
The looting goes pretty much as planned. Each crew member takes a quadrant and an anti-grav, self-expanding backpack that can take up as much as 500 lb at a time, and goes at it with will. Naruto can hear the crashes from all the way across the ship. He takes a corner at random and comes across a sealed door that for some reason he finds irresistible. Busting it open, he is only a little disappointed to find it an old storage cupboard full with rich, perfectly preserved silks and satins. He shakes out a yukata at random and is delighted to find it in his favorite orange color, with a dark red obi and swirls etched into the sleeves and back. Even better--it is light and reassuringly solid at the same time. Naruto grins. Finders keepers is a fantastic law to have in pirating circles. He tucks it away for later. The rest go into the backpack along with some wood-and-gold writing boxes that he found in the previous room.
He takes a last look around the quarters and, satisfied, makes his way to the kitchens and pantry. "What have we got?" he yells out, almost salivating at the thought of something not peach-flavored.
"Loads, captain!" Kiba barks, victorious. "There's at least half a ton of supplies that we can avail ourselves of! I've already had half of them sent out with Konohamaru and Shino; this is the last lot."
"Excellent! We'll have ourselves a feast tonight, boys!"
He bounces back out of the door, heading in Haku's direction. He is curious to see how far Haku has got with ripping Gai's ship's engine apart and putting it back together so that it goes vroom in the distance. He's almost at the platform when a huge crash hits the wreck hard, shattering the stern and throwing the entire bulk forward by a few feet at least.
"Fucking hell, what now?" Naruto grouches as he runs towards the Soragakure. He knew this wreck was too juicy to go unnoticed! He catches a glimpse of a huge black hulk of a ship flashing past, and... are those red clouds painted on the sides? "Oh, shit," he swears, with feeling.
---
"Akatsuki is outside of the wreckage," Jiraiya booms over the speakers. He sends the same message over the communications channel so that Naruto, Chouji, Ino, Sai, and Kiba get the news, as well. "All hands prepare for an emergency combat situation. Engaging transporters. Clear the transporter pad for the captain and his companions."
"W-wait, Jiraiya, if you transport us, we won't be able to take the loot," Naruto says over his communicator.
"Safety of the crew and its captain over material possessions," Jiraiya responds. "Confirmation?"
Sakura stares at the intercom above her room.
"Sakura-chan, tell him no. I do not fucking confirm this. Take Ino, Kiba, and Chouji back, I'll grab the loot."
"Confirmation?" Jiraiya prompts.
"Confirmed," Sakura replies, biting her lip.
Seconds later, Naruto storms out of the transporter room and down the hall to the med lab. "Sakura!"
Sakura folds her arms. "Don't you start with me, Naruto--!" She scowls. "They're after you, and if Ino or Chouji or Kiba had volunteered, it would have been different, but--"
"Shit," Jiraiya's voice rings out. "Breach in security," he snaps. "The Power of Youth," and even though Jiraiya doesn't have a face, Naruto can hear him grimace at the name, "has just taken off for the Whirlpool wreckage."
Naruto pumps one fist into the air. "Who's piloting?"
"Uchiha Sasuke," Haku says over the radio. "As soon as he saw Akatsuki's ship, he went berserk. Shall Zabuza and I go after him?"
"He'll be fine," Naruto replies.
"No, I'm afraid he won't." Kakashi enters the room with his usual punctuality. "Prior to joining Orochimaru's crew, when Sasuke was very young--about eight years old--his brother murdered his entire clan."
"Who, Itachi? But he's on our side--Granny Tsunade--" Naruto protests.
"Yes, but Sasuke doesn't care whose side Itachi is on, he cares whether or not he is still alive." Kakashi pockets his copy of "Icha Icha Zero Gravity", revealing the severity of the situation. "He would much prefer that Itachi be dead by his own hands."
---
Sasuke clenches the battered ship's controls in a death grip, staring unseeingly at the landscape. He only realizes he is about to hit the open hangar space when he is a hundred meters off; he takes lightning-fast evasive maneuvers that, surprisingly, work--Haku may not look strong, but apparently he's a whizz with mechanics. He lands, light as a feather, just where he meant to. He unclips the seatbelts with practiced movements. He stands, taking out his phaser, setting it to kill. He drops the runway, which opens much more smoothly than those of Kirigakure's average ships, and exits. He takes a deep breath and tries to reign in the rage, the anger, the hurt and betrayal simmering through his veins instead of blood. This time--this time it's final.
A noise behind him makes him jump several feet in the air. Completely wired, he spins around, gun flashing in the sparse lights, only to come face-to-face with a pale Karin.
"What the hell are you doing here?" he snaps, nerves strained.
Karin shuffles her feet, looking at him from under her eyelashes. "You looked really grim when you left, Sasuke, I didn't want to leave you alone out here."
"This is personal, you have no part in it! I can't believe you fucking trailed me! This is a total invasion of my privacy! Go the fuck away!"
"Now, now, little brother, is that any way to treat a lady?"
Sasuke's neck almost snaps with the speed his head whips round. How did he never hear Itachi land? He hadn't realised the damned drug had worn off until this very moment, and that's really not like him. He glares at his older brother, his family, his vengeance, his everything. He hates him so much, so very much, that he can hardly speak. He chokes on Itachi's name, has to stop and swallow before he can force it out of his suddenly-too-dry mouth. The brothers lock their gazes; Sasuke feels like there should be lightning sizzling between the two of them. Sasuke lifts his phaser with a too-steady hand, points it between Itachi's eyes, and completely fails to shoot. He takes in the black-and-red robe, the deep valleys etched into his face, his relaxed stance, his hands hanging by his sides and fights the urge to cry, and scream, and just ask him, why?
"You never told me you had a brother, Sasuke!" Karin leers, sashays over to where Itachi is standing, hips swaying from side to side. She shakes her long pink hair over her shoulder and puffs up her chest so that her almost nonexistant breasts jut out further. She stops right in front of him and trails a hand over his arm and higher on his shoulder. Itachi looks at her, blinks, turns to Sasuke again with a delicately-raised eyebrow that translates to a clear what the hell? marring his typically-reserved face. Sasuke wants to smack his palm to his forehead, but that might result in shooting himself--he settles for rolling his eyes instead, grimacing at Itachi and Karin.
Itachi seems to shudder and Karin's hand slides off of him like water. She seems taken aback, but takes the opportunity to circle him and ogle his toned backside. Sasuke would laugh himself hoarse at the look on Itachi's face if he wasn't too busy fuming. "Karin, get away from him! For fuck's sake, move out of the way, I'm trying to kill him!"
"Have you not stopped deluding yourself, little brother? You could never kill me if I didn't let you. Now, let's be serious. We hear that you are traveling with some very interesting companions these days. Tell me about Uzumaki Naruto."
"What makes you think I would tell you anything about Naruto?"
"'Naruto'? That sounds like first-name basis. You two aren't getting close are you?" Itachi says in the teasing way only an older brother can.
Sasuke's face gains a delicate pink tinge across his cheekbones; Itachi's eyes fasten on it and he grins, like a spider at a fly. "Interesting," he purrs.
Sasuke raises the gun again, leveling it at Itachi's face with no hesitation. "Karin, get back," he instructs.
Karin leaps back at his words, not questioning the sudden darkening of his facial expression. That's why he never talks about his brother, she decides. If that's how Sasuke feels about Itachi, she's not sure she wants to see him much more, either. A pretty face doesn't make up for whatever he must have done to Sasuke.
Sasuke fires.
The shot goes cleanly through Itachi's head; the phaser ripping through Itachi's skull like--
That's not Itachi's skull, Karin realizes. The person in front of her flickers for a moment, like static on a radio, complete with a softfsssszht noise. It's not Itachi anymore, it's a blond man, hair slicked back. Sasuke sneers. "Where is Itachi?"
The blond reaches up to wipe away a drop of blood rolling down his nose, only managing to smear it. "Fucked if I know. We suspect he has defected. His partner's gone, too, though, and we know Kisame is loyal," the man coos.
Sasuke's mind reels, flickering over memories of 'Wanted' posters and signs. Orochimaru had a whole wall for the Akatsuki ones. "Hidan," he says at last.
"Oh, look at that, I'm fucking famous," Hidan replies.
Karin backs up farther. This man just took a head shot. She wants no part of being close to someone like that.
"But enough about me--let's talk about Naruto. Captain of the Soragakure, a former resident of Konoha, ex-lover of Gaara of the Desert. We know a goddamn lot about him, but what I really want to know is how the fuck to get him out here. He's got a program inside of him," Hidan taps his temples, "and we want a copy of it."
Sasuke widens the radius of his phaser's beam as Karin steps as far away from Hidan as she can get without falling off the platform. He fires again, no remorse. He'd prefer not to kill if he can help it, but--
Hidan coughs up blood as the hole in his torso closes. "Damn, what the hell was that for? You know, shooting people leads to killing people, and killing people leads to hell, unless you're with the right religion, of course." Hidan grins, blood covering his teeth.
Karin slams a large hunk of metal into the back of his head. He falls unconscious. "Should we take him back to the ship?"
Sasuke shakes his head, heading for Akatsuki's shuttle.
"Sasuke," Karin tries, receiving no visible response.
Over their communicators, static fizzles.
---
"Goddamn it, I can't reach him," Naruto growls in despair. He has no idea if the idiot is even still alive. Karin seems to have slipped out with him as well; Jiraiya can't reach either of them through the communicators Sasuke stole from Haku and Zabuza.
"We should attack," Kakashi says. "That, or run for the hills."
"We fire on that ship, they're going to fire right back at us. In fact, I'm amazed that they haven't already flamed us to ash," Jiraiya opines. "You prepared for that option?"
"Damn it, we have to do something! Not to mention that the loot is still down there... Hey! Maybe I could go back down there, fetch the stuff and collect Sasuke while I'm at it--"
"NO!" Sakura and Iruka glare at him; Kakashi looks bored in a I'mma break your neck if you make as much as a move for the cargo bay kind of way, and Sai just looks bored.
The comms crackle. "Uchiha to Uzumaki. Uzumaki, do you read?"
"Oi! Where the hell are you? Get back on this ship right now!"
"Naruto, two things. One, since when have I taken orders from you, or anyone? And two, I can't come back just yet. Akatsuki are after you. Repeat, Akatsuki's target is you. Do not leave the ship! I'll be back in a bit, I'm just going to break their plasma boosters so they can't follow. Over and out!"
"No, wait! Wait, goddamn it!" Naruto hits the console hard enough to rattle the screen. "That fucking prick! When I get my hands on him..."
"Naruto! Do not worry yourself, I am here! How can I assist you in your worthy endeavor--"
"Not now, Gai! Unless you have a way to get my loot back on board, get Princess to stop acting like an absolute moron and return to the ship so that we can escape!"
"I may have a solution to at least one of those problems, my youthful companion! Fear not! You can leave the retrieval of the needed goods to me! Teleport me and my beloved student Lee back onto the Whirlpool wreck and we shall take care of the supplies shortage presently!"
"That's actually--yeah. Thanks, Gai." Naruto grins, feeling closer to stable ground again. "Jiraiya--you heard the man. Do it. Gai, make sure you report on the situation when you're down there and have visuals."
Gai salutes, Lee eagerly following suit. They are beamed down; seconds later communications between Gai and the Soragakure are established. So it's just Sasuke's comm that is malfunctioning. Naruto wonders for a moment what could set off a localised frequency blocker before deciding the bastard is probably doing it himself, so that Naruto will be denied the pleasure of yelling himself hoarse at him.
"Supplies and valuables are untouched on the ground. No sight of Sasuke or Karin. One unconscious body on the ground, dressed in Akatsuki gear; it is not Uchiha Itachi. Visuals confirm a blond man who has been shot several times. Awaiting instructions--should we dispose of him?" Gai says, as utterly professional as he usually is when deployed in the field.
Naruto considers for less than two seconds. "Throw him out into space, then pick up the goods and get your asses back here! I don't want to risk it. We'll have to go back for Sasuke once he deigns to let us know his position."
"Copy, Captain Uzumaki. Over and out!"
Twelve minutes later Gai and Lee are back, and a body can be seen drifting in orbit of the crash site. "It won't be enough, you know," Jiraiya says darkly. "Some of those bastards have nanobytes in their blood, filtering through the discarded oxygen and keeping their lungs inflated and blood-supplied. I'm not even sure if the vacuum would be enough to kill him."
"Yeah, well, it's the best we've got for now," Naruto huffs. At least the loot is safely on board. Now, if only Princess would get his ass in gear and call in so they can pick him up and leave the wreckage! He knew it was way too close to the pirate trading routes to be safe!
"Everyone, report your status!" he orders, for something to keep him occupied and stop him storming over the Akatsuki ship and blowing it up.
"Kiba, Ino, Shikamaru, Shino, Chouji, all present in cargo deck storing away the loot!"
"Konohamaru, assisting Sakura in sick bay with Juugo and Suigetsu's mandatory check-ups!"
"Haku, upgrading the emergency pods!"
"Zabuza, in the weapons deck with Gai and Lee!"
The rest of them are in the room with him. Everyone present and correct, except for that--that--augh!
"I'm gonna kill him! What's he doing over there anyway? And where's his brother? Would you send a lackey to do your job if it was your own brother who wanted to kill you very dead?"
Sai says nothing, smiling politely and vacantly at him as he flails around the bridge, cursing viciously at Uchihas and their ancestors.
---
Sasuke, contrary to what Naruto would say given the two days he's been getting to know him, is actually quite stealthy. Karin is not as stealthy, but Sasuke, in his limitless genius, has come up with a solution for that, as well. He moves forward, incapacitates another Akatsuki member, then turns around and waves Karin over.
Unfortunately, someone should have told him that if it seems too easy to infiltrate the ship of a crew of pirates wanted by every colony, country, world, and small gathering of people coming together just for the purpose of proclaiming the undying value of youth, knitting, or other inane things--it probably is.
If Naruto had been on board, he would have snapped "Who's the dumbass now, princess?" after deflecting the carefully aimed tranquilizer. As it stands, Naruto was not allowed to leave the Soragakure, Karin is still two rooms and a hallway away, and the tranq lands square in Sasuke's backside.
Within seconds, everything goes black. Akatsuki doesn't hold back on their sedatives.
---
"Should we send someone to check on him, captain?" Lee asks, leaning over the console.
Juugo enters the room. "I volunteer. Karin and Sasuke have been gone for too long without contact."
"Let them rot," Suigetsu replies, leaning on Zabuza's sword like he owns it again. "Sasuke will come back when he wants to, and not before. Like he cares if we're worried."
"I apologize for the interruption, but perhaps your crew should be acting with more haste...?" comes from the speakers. Only trouble is, that's certainly not Jiraiya's voice.
"Who the fuck is that?" Naruto yells, spinning round to face the screen. An image is slowly emerging from the snowflakes of no transmission. Dark hair, dark eyes, deep valleys running down the blank face, Akatsuki robe... "Sasuke?" Naruto asks tentatively.
"No," Kakashi fills in grimly. "Hello, Itachi. It's been a while."
"I-Itachi? Sasuke's homicidal brother? I thought Sasuke went over to the Akatsuki ship to kill him!"
"He did. Unfortunately, my foolish little brother did not consider the possibility that I might no longer be on it."
"Yeah, the little shit's far too impulsive to be called an Uchiha." There's a face emerging from the background, a pale, fishy-looking face with weird sunken eyes and too-sharp teeth.
"What now? Oh, hey, any relation to Zabuza?" Naruto wonders, ever the ice-breaker.
"Don't talk to me about that failure! He's an embarrassment," the shark-toothed stranger snaps.
"Kisame," Itachi murmurs and Kisame is instantly silent, if still pouting. "You would be Naruto, I presume. You look just like Minato. You have Kushina's face, though," and there's something in his voice that makes Naruto's heart pound. He must have known them, Naruto realizes; nobody speaks of them like that unless they had been close to them. Naruto opens his mouth to ask about this, but Itachi cuts him off.
"No time for foolish gaping. The vital signs monitors in Sasuke's eyes are reacting; something has gone wrong, he appears to be unconscious. You must get on that ship and retrieve him; he won't be able to make it out alone. If it involves Deidara, it's something explosive. Go over there now. I will distract them and provide you with an opening."
"Wait, wait, wait. Sasuke's eyes? What the fuck? Anyway, why are you telling us this? Doesn't he want you dead? And how the hell did you hack into my ship?"
"Jiraiya-sama is getting too confident in his old age; it was much too easy. After all, I know his weaknesses."
"Well, un-hack him for fuck's sake, I can't take off without him. Hell, if I'd known how much trouble the Princess would get into, I never would have rescued him from that ship in the first place. What are you waiting for? Hurry! I need a diversion now," he shouts, already racing for the transportation pads.
"I think I like him, even if he is entirely too loud," Kisame muses as the picture starts to fade. Kakashi can't be sure, but he thinks he may have seen Itachi smile before murmuring an affirmative.
Naruto hears none of this as he accelerates. He hears footsteps pounding to his left and sees Juugo racing alonside him. "I'm coming, too," he says, and Naruto already knows not to argue with that tone. Emerging into the cargo bay, he legs it to the nearest shuttle, which happens to be Gai's ship. Fuck, he's damned if he's using the usual call sign! He thunders on board anyway; it's up-to-scratch at last since Haku's been tinkering with it for over three hours already. Juugo straps in next to him; he switches on the engines and is about to take off when he hears a faint, "Wait for me, damnit!" and a panting Suigetsu staggers up the runway at the last moment.
"I thought you weren't coming," Naruto taunts; Suigetsu grimaces.
"And miss all the fighting? Like hell." He rubs along the sheathed blade of Zabuza's sword lovingly. "What?" he says at Naruto's raised eyebrows. "I borrowed it."
"Does Zabuza know you 'borrowed' it?"
"He will eventually," Suigetsu grins a very toothy grin, glowing with satisfaction.
Naruto shakes his head and takes off at last. He thinks he sees a flash over at Akatsuki's ship; seconds later it's there again. "Are they shooting at it? Damnit, Sasuke's still on board that thing!" He fiddles with the comms. "Oi! Blond Ambition to Arrogant Bastard, your brother's still on that ship you're trying to shoot out of the sky!" he yells into the ether, with no hope of reply. He almost falls out of his seat when he gets one.
"Then you'd better hurry. You seem very concerned about my brother."
"Asshole!" Naruto bellows, but pumps up the accelerator. They zoom towards the already flaming ship, barely hitting the open gateway and skidding to a stop inside through the molecule-thin forcefield keeping the pressurised environment intact. The runway drops and the three peek out to see if they have been noticed, which, considering the noise their landing made, should be a resounding 'yes'. The comm fizzles static and Itachi's voice stops Naruto just as he's about to jump out.
"Take the scanner with you. I'm transferring over the signal from Sasuke's eyes. There are seventeen life forces on my screen, and since we know that two of them are Sasuke and his companion, that makes fifteen Akatsuki members to keep a lookout for. Do not go in overconfident or under-prepared."
Naruto bristles. "You are a royal pain in the ass, you know that? I can definitely see the family resemblance. You just keep distracting them, I'll do your job for you."
"Don't strain yourself," Itachi deadpans, and is gone.
"Right. Let's go. We have ourselves a Princess to save." I wonder if he'd throw himself at my feet in gratitude? Naruto muses, and then remembers whom he's thinking about, and snorts. Maybe Sasuke'll kiss him in thanks for the daring rescue while he's at it, he snarks to himself. Yeah, and Chouji will go on a diet.
---
"Fire is coming from a stray Alliance ship; all probability points to a hijacking," Konan reports, her fingers dancing over the controls of the ship. Their current ship, Hungry Ghost, is taking more fire than it can handle, but Nagato had planned for this. Konan flips the release on Hungry Ghost's escape hatch, steering the smaller ship into space under stealth mode.
"Why aren't we firing back at those traitors?" Deidara snaps. "Let me have the controls, c'mon, I'm a dead shot, I can take them out with minimal ammo!"
"Hush, Deidara," Nagato hisses. "Kisame's allegiances are still unknown."
"Shark-san?" Tobi coos. "But he is so cool! Itachi-san, too! Betrayal breaks Tobi's heart!"
"How did Itachi know that we have Sasuke?" Zetsu asks. He twitches, his voice deepening as he answers himself, "He probably tracks the brat. Sasuke is his precious little brother."
"We've left a few surprises behind for the traitor and the Uchiha. We're not going to make it easy for them," Nagato states, fiddling with the remote controls for Hungry Ghost.
"Oooh, you've left presents?" Tobi squeals.
"Close enough," Deidara smirks as explosions start going off in the distance. The firing from the hijacked vessel seems to have tapered off, and Konan concludes that the traitor must have swiped some of their software on his way out of the organization--their distinctive signatures have no other way of being spotted than with the quantum frequency detector, she'd made sure of that. Still, she's inclined to thing of this outcome as successful--one Uchiha down, the other on his way there if the clones have anything to say about it. And the ninth piece of the code so very close to their grasp! She hopes Nagato knows what he's doing. They'll never live it down if this plan fails.
---
Naruto creeps against the wall, Juugo and Suigetsu watching his back and side. The firing from the outside has stopped. Naruto is sure this means something, but with Itachi it's anyone's guess what exactly. He wishes for he umpteenth time that he had the presence of mind to grab the communicator, but he had wanted radio silence to stave off detection. Maybe everyone has a point when they say he doesn't think things through too well before charging.
Nah, he thinks. He's awesome. He can wing it.
A sixth sense tells him to duck; since it has saved his life more times than he can count, he listens to it. He barely dodges a sedative dart aimed at his shoulder. "Juugo! Suigetsu! Heads-up!" he shouts--no sense in staying silent any longer. Suigetsu jumps in front of him, sword drawn and ready. He deflects a second dart with his blade, hissing, "They're coming from up ahead on the right. On three. One... two... th--"
Naruto sprints up to the corner, Suigetsu's swearing ringing in his ears. He turns it at speed, already in a battle stance. He lands a flying kick at the figure waiting there for him, obviously taking it by surprise and sending it flying, smashing the tranquiliser gun against the wall. He takes quick note of the guy, clocking in the flaming orange hair, the piercings, the weird purple eyes staring at him in shock before he knocks him out with a well-placed hit to the side of his head.
"Clear," he yells and checks the signal from Sasuke's life signs monitor. Conveniently, it's coming from straight ahead and a little on the left. He rushes forward, keeping an eye (and a feel) out for more interference. He almost jumps out of his skin when the ship's communications crackle with static, and Itachi's voice rumbles out.
"Uzumaki, hurry! Most of the heat signals have abandoned ship; I count nine left, one down. I have to break communications; I'm being hacked. I am leaving this to you. Do not fail." And he's gone, just like that.
"You guys hear that? Eight more hostiles somewhere ahead. Watch your step!"
---
Sasuke is awoken by movement. He is unceremoniously slung across someone's shoulders again. After a moment, he recognizes the orange longcoat as Naruto's. He makes a mental note to never admit to being able to identify Naruto by ass alone.
They pass a body--orange hair, and facial piercings, very distinctive. There is no blood, just a snapped neck. Juugo's work, probably. There is a clang and a shot in the distance. "FUCK," Suigetsu wails, then another clang. Lovely.
"Hurk," Sasuke tries to push himself off of Naruto's shoulder. "I'm awake, dumbass, let me down."
"No can do--we're on the move and you're still not fully recovered. Where is Karin?"
"No idea--didn't we just pass that body a minute ago?" The one on the floor has a phaser burn through the chest. There is a puddle of blood under him.
Naruto takes a moment to reply between heavy breaths, "Yeah. Clones."
Naruto rounds a corner. Sasuke can see Juugo in the opposite direction, fighting... the same person Sasuke saw on the floor. Twice. "How many of him are there?"
Naruto shrugs under Sasuke. Fuck, but that's uncomfortable, Sasuke thinks as Naruto's shoulder digs into his hips. "There were eight."
---
Eventually they make their way down the corridor after counting six clones down. Sasuke is only just now becoming aware enough to realise they are one crew member down. He's right in time, too--Naruto is striding swiftly, Sasuke's weight bouncing over his shoulder.
"We can'- can't leave yet, Karin is sti--still missing. This i--is ridiculous. Put me down, you us--useless moron!"
Sasuke regrets his words when he is unceremoniously dumped on the floor, Naruto towering over him. Sasuke scowls, narrowing his eyes vindictively. He is so getting Naruto back for this. Ungracefully, he makes his way to standing position.
"Fine, Princess. Know how to locate her? Because seems to me we're still two clones down from the full set and I don't fancy her chances against them, they are quite inventive for a bunch of cells."
"You underestimate Karin." The defence comes from the most unlikely source--Suigetsu continues while cleaning up his sword, which he has been putting to very good use. "She's a whiny bitch, but even one of her nanobots in your bloodstream and you'll die in screaming agony with no chance of survival."
He's not wrong - when they eventually stumble on Karin's location using the trial-and-error search method (which essentially means sticking their heads through every door they come up to) the remaining two clones are lying in pools of cooling blood and Karin is healing a long gash in her arm. The bloody laser-edged knife at her belt suggests it's self-inflicted. "What took you idiots so long?" she bitches, immediately raising Suigetsu's hackles when she bats her eyelashes at Sasuke. "Are you alright, Sasuke? Why don't you take off your shirt so I can evaluate your injuries?" she leers.
"Get off your lazy ass, we have to get moving. We ought to have been gone hours ago, but we had to look for your bloated corpse before Sasuke would count you down."
Suigetsu's dig backfires when Karin drapes all over Sasuke, cooing her appreciation very loudly.
Sasuke sidesteps her with an ease that results in Karin falling off him to sprawl on the floor in an undignified heap.
"We have to go. We don't have time for games." Naruto stands a little way off. He is slightly disturbed by his newly discovered desire to smash Karin's nose in when she paws at Sasuke's chest. He shakes his head in resignation and walks off. It's not even ten seconds later before the loud bickering follows him like a bad smell. They make it onto the ship with no further mishaps, bar a couple of charges going off in the distance and completely frying the comm network and the data stores. Suigetsu is livid and almost gets his left hand blown off before Sasuke drags him amongst flailing protests off the electronics panel and on board the shuttle.
"Shut up, all of you!" Naruto finally yells after what feels like hours of circular arguments. "I've had enough--I'm landing us on Sora-chan, and we're getting the fuck out of this quadrant, are we clear? We got the loot we wanted in the first place, so we're done here. Read my lips: I do not care that your brother is insane, has defected from Akatsuki and seems to be on our side now. You two sort out your shit on your own time!"
It's the longest rant that the four have heard coming from Naruto, and they are slightly taken aback by the volume, if not the content. Sasuke scowls so hard that his eyes almost close as they bore into the back of Naruto's neck, but Naruto is unmoved. He's said his piece; he's truly reached his crap-per-day limit for the time being. They are going to go fetch Gaara and take care of this Kyuubi shit once and for all so he can go home and gorge himself on blessed ramen in peace, with no innuendo from strange villains, no fucking dark-haired scowling Princess to give him a hard-on he does not want nor need, no new crew members crawling out from the woodwork at every corner. Just no.
Naruto has no idea why the hell he's so annoyed; he thinks there's probably a good chance it's Karin's incessant passes at Sasuke and Suigetsu's resulting sulking. And not a single word of thanks for saving both their asses--not that he needs thanks, but it's just good manners! If they don't shut the fuck up soon, someone's going to get it, and good, he decides.
---
Naruto, along with Sasuke's team, is ushered into the med lab as soon as they return to the Soragakure.
"Sakura-chaaaaan," he wails. "I'm fine! This is completely unnecessary."
Sakura removes a tiny tracking device from where it has tried to burrow into his shoulder.
"Ow! What was that for?"
She holds up the tracker with an I-told-you-so look. "Konohamaru-kun, please check Suigetsu and Juugo."
Konohamaru nods, moving to Suigetsu's side.
Sakura makes her way to Karin in the tiny med-lab room, but is dismissed. "Nanites already cannibalized it," Karin says. She continues to file her nails, ignoring Sakura.
Sakura throws her an evil look, but moves on. She needs to get all she can from this one before she murders her from sheer irritation. Konohamaru grunts as he tugs out another tracking device trying to burrow its way into Juugo's shoulder. Suigetsu rolls his eyes, reaches into his sleeve and removes a jack, which he then proceeds to jam into his arm. Sakura's eyebrows disappear under her fringe when she sees the implant Suigetsu has just violated with the copper metal plug. He grunts in discomfort, but there's a satisfied smile on his face, too.
"What?" he wonders when he sees the way Sakura's looking at him. "Hacker, remember? This is just a tiny implant; you should see my legs!"
"I did see your legs, and there was nothing there!"
"Oh, yeah, camouflage shimmer, I forgot. Look, you know the hackers' motto, 'always prepared'? Well, I am. I have a bunch of programming inside me; much easier to download into ships' computers, and much faster, too--time is always of the essence when you're about to get blown to bits."
"Huh," Sakura allows, but secretly knows he has a point. "See, Naruto? Not everyone freaks out about a bit of coding inside them!"
Naruto grunts, unimpressed. "I know that! Remember what Jiraiya was like by the end of it? More machine than human. I can't even remember if he still had even one of his own limbs left before he transferred himself to full-time program. That's not the point! No program ever managed to take him over, make him lose control!"
Suigetsu snorts. "You just have to learn to control it, if that's the case. I can teach you. Even Jiraiya could teach you, and Kakashi knows a thing or two about programming as well. I'm amazed neither of them have trained you on it yet."
Naruto bristles. "Jiraiya! Is that true? WHY THE HELL DIDN'T YOU SAY SO IN THE FIRST PLACE?"
Jiraiya clears his throat nervously over the speakers, a habit left over from his days of being human. "Er. I sort of wanted to let Tsunade explain, first."
"But she didn't! I still have no fucking idea what the hell this thing is! Look, I think it's time we had a talk, just you, me, and Kakashi. Okay?"
Sakura hits him. "Oi! Don't even for a second think you're going to exclude me! I have a right to know what fucked up thing is going on with my Captain!"
Naruto looks at her, eyes slightly shiny from the sting of the hit. "Sakura-chan! You've never called me 'captain' before!" he wibbles.
Sakura blushes. "Yes, well. Shut up."
Jiraiya sighs. "Fine. Meet on the bridge in half an hour. I'll let Kakashi know."
"Finally! I want some answers, and it's about damn time I got them."
---
"You agreed to this?" Kakashi asks, voice neutral.
"I had to. Look, he has a right to know the facts. It's his body. And it was his dad who made the choice in the first place."
"Hey, I'm all for it. Just thought I'd check you were good to go ahead and tell him."
"I'm standing right here."
"Kinda hard to miss you, kid."
"Hey! I resent that!"
"Look, do you want to know all this or not?"
Naruto vibrates with impatience in his chair. "Yes! Get on with it!"
Jiraiya sighs in exasperation; if he was still human he'd have been rolling his eyes, Sakura was sure. "Okay. I'll start at the beginning, shall I? Your dad, Namikaze 'Yellow Flash' Minato was one of Konoha's best-known and best-loved leaders. He had a strict code of conduct, placing loyalty to Konoha and its people above any other search for power. He was fiercely protective of the well-being of the Konoha citizens; so, he clashed quite a lot with the Elders, who were all about having a combat power advantage.
"Then, one day a horrifying virus found its way into the Konoha mainframe. The oxygen supply failed when the virus hacked into it. The external shields were taken down, some of the doors were opened... there was just so much damage. So many deaths. Minato went to Sarutobi-sensei, who used to be Konoha's leader before Minato took over. He said the virus needed to be contained or it would wipe out the entire population. He said he'd worked out a way to do it, but it meant sacrificing one of the children to save the village. He trapped the virus in a harddrive and implanted it into your spine, creating a cyborg bone structure to put the data inside. He marked its position by the seal on your belly. He knew that the virus was extremely powerful, and could do incredible things for the person who controlled it."
Naruto lifts his shirt, but his bare stomach is flat and unmarked. Sasuke stares at it; then, with some effort, makes himself look away.
"It only appears when the program is active. It's the reason why you have your preternatural reflexes and awareness, Naruto. The virus program analyzes the surroundings, down to the smallest nanoparticles, and feeds the info back into your neural cortex. The only person able to fool the virus is someone with a certan type of cyborg eyes. Your father was very, very smart and forward-thinking. To make sure you would be protected from the side-effects of the virus being inside you, he got together with Uchiha Fugaku, Sasuke's father and Konoha's resident cybernetic geneticist, and created the Sharingan eye implant. It is genetically unique in that only the Uchiha clan can operate it to its full potential. He then surgically replaced the eyes of the entire Uchiha clan with the new implant."
"That's why you reacted so violently to looking into Sasuke's eyes. They are designed to seek out the virus program and activate it," Kakashi adds in a soft voice. "The program can only ever be fully extracted if a Sharingan user is present at the time, so that the Sharingan program can trip the lockdown code Minato-sensei placed on it."
"So... it was my dad who put that thing in me?"
"Yes. So that you could save the village he loved so much. And because he knew you would find it useful someday, and it would keep you safe despite all the people who want control over the program."
"But--that happened in Konoha, right? So how come we live in Hoshiigakure now?"
"You know the Elders?" At Naruto's affirmative nod, Jiraiya snorts bitterly. "They were supposed to protect you, as per Minato's instructions. Hawking knows Tsunade and I tried, but they wanted you locked up and held in a stasis field until they'd found a way to extract the program. Then Orochimaru tried to abduct you to get hold of it, and things got really out of hand. Danzou declared Martial Law in Konoha and tried to claim you for the arsenal. Everyone had had enough by that point. Your mother packed a few bags, took you and came to us, begging us to help her smuggle you out of Konoha. Uchiha Fugaku happened to be with us at the time when she arrived; he agreed to take the entire Uchiha clan and go into hiding with us.
"It was inevitable that Danzou would catch wind of this plan. That's where Itachi comes in. Danzou ordered the extermination of the Uchiha clan, thinking that the Sharingan eyes were the only way to leash in the virus. Itachi, loyal to Konoha to the last and worried that the virus might well fall into the wrong hands with the Uchiha clan leaving and scattering, complied. We all thought the entire clan extinct, save for Itachi. We thought Sasuke to be dead, too, although we never found his body and Kakashi remained certain that he was still alive. Now it looks like Orochimaru kidnapped Sasuke and took off with him, since he, too, disappeared around that time.
"Anyway, the Heads of the Five clans were furious. We made plans to leave as soon as possible. One day all of us just got up and took off, about two hundred souls with four S-class ships at our disposal. We flew in evasive maneuvers while the Hoshiigakure was built in between fleeing. What we didn't know was that the two Elders had decided to come with us. A small shuttle with two passengers went virtually unnoticed beside the larger ships. It wasn't until we all landed and took our stations on Hoshii that they came out, declaring they were joining us officially. We were labeled pirates and outlaws for our defection; Hoshii became our own Village Hidden in the Stars. Meanwhile, Danzou formed the Alliance with the other five Hidden Villages, which was aimed at destroying us and Akatsuki."
A contemplative silence falls over the bridge. The younger crew members had never really thought about why they live on Hoshiigakure, only that they do.
Naruto breaks the silence, as is his habit. "What happened to my mum?"
Kakashi's eye is pained and filled with guilt. "She was killed by assassins from Danzou's Root ANBU Division. I was supposed to protect her, I promised Minato-sensei I would. But you were ill, and I'd taken you to Soragakure to ask Jiraiya to check what was wrong with you, and she was alone in the house when they came for you. She wouldn't tell them where you were, so they killed her. I'm sorry."
Naruto sits there looking crushed and and seriously pissed off, a combination only he can pull off. "It all comes back to that bastard Danzou. My dad, my mum, Sasuke's entire clan... We're going to have to do something about him. And you are going to help me do it. For starters, what the hell has Gaara to do with all this?"
"Ah. We get to the hard part. Okay. So, it turns out this virus was not alone. It was a part of a huge program, one so big that it couldn't be contained in a single vessel. So, nine parts of it were broken off and placed in hosts much like yourself, but every host has a different method of storing the data. Gaara was one of those hosts, but his father never bothered with placing a failsafe, or implanting the data in a way that extraction keeps the host alive. Remember when he got kidnapped and you went to help? And Chiyo-sama replaced his cyborg heart with her own? The program was sealed inside Gaara's heart. Gaara was supposed to have died when the virus was extracted."
Naruto clenches his fists. He's starting to hate this virus more and more with every passing moment.
"You have the largest chunk, the Kyuubi." Naruto flinches, finally understanding all the jibes he has received from the Elders over the years. "That's why Akatsuki are after you. They want to collect all the chunks back at the mainframe, which is where the tenth piece remains. And obviously they need an Uchiha, so they want Sasuke now that Itachi has defected from their organization. What they don't know is that Itachi has been a double agent all this time, working with us and feeding us information on Akatsuki. He finally left them only a couple of days ago when he clocked Sasuke being rescued by us.
"Unfortunately, from Itachi's information, the only two pieces of the program remaining free are you and the eigth biggest chunk. Akatsuki have already harvested the rest of them, killing their hosts. So, our objective is to get to the mainframe before Akatsuki can get hold of us, download your part of the program into it and take control."
"What does the machine do?" Sasuke asks.
"Nobody knows. The nine viral pieces of it are extremely hostile and agressive; we can only imagine what the complete program does. What we do know is that we absolutely have to keep it out of Akatsuki hands by any means necesary."
"Right then," Naruto says, flexing his fingers and stretching. He's back to his boundless-energy-self, and everyone breathes a sigh of relief. "Here's the plan. We go fetch Gaara, come up with a way to sidetrack Akatsuki while we sneak our way to the mainframe, download the data and you guys teach me to control it! It's a foolproof plan!"
Sakura rolls her eyes. "Unfortunately, it doesn't look to be a Naruto-proof one."
"Did you hit your head as a child?" Sasuke asks. "You can't even control the current program. Judging by size alone, you're not going to be able to integrate with it like Suigetsu, or Kakashi's lightning glove. You have to override it with your will without crushing it. It's a delicate process. That's why this ship is legendary--not because you're an intergalactic amazing pirate captain, but because Jiraiya, who was an intergalactic amazing pirate captain, is the mind of the ship. Soragakure still functions like she should, yet you have a sentient, formerly-human mind in there with her, controlling the whole thing. You do realize that Soragakure is not just the only ship with those capabilities in the galaxy, but the only ship with those capabilities ever, right?"
Naruto blinks. It's the most Sasuke has said since he was dragged onto the ship. "What?" He cocks his head. "So, if Jiraiya can do it, I can do it," he confirms.
"Yes, Naruto," Kakashi agrees smoothly. "That is exactly what he was saying."
Naruto nods. "Good! When do we start?"
Sakura puts her face gently into the palm of her hand, and sighs.
---
Onwards to Part Three!
Part Two
"Sakura-chan! I'm home!"
He gets a thump to the back of his head for his troubles.
"I can't believe you agreed to have more people on this ship! This lot is enough!"
"C'mon, Sakura-chan, I couldn't leave them stranded, could I? We need more people, you know that." Nearly a quarter of Soragakure's crew was left at Hoshii. That's a greater loss than Naruto or Sakura had expected; limitations on space and food supply be damned, they really could use the extra help.
Sakura folds her arms and glares at Sasuke. He is dirty, and sweaty, and dusty from all the running, and Sakura wants to lick him. Sasuke narrows his eyes back at her.
"Can you neanderthals tell me where I can wash? And it would be really nice to see a bed sometime today." His head is still blurry and he really needs to lie down before he collapses right in front of the enemy. Sakura looks at him for a moment, deciding whether she cares enough; apparently her irritation wins out and she exhales heavily.
"Naruto, show him to D549. I've had Jiraiya clean it up and take off the antibacterial sheets on the furniture."
Naruto splutters. "But that's right next door to me! I don't want Princess that close! A captain needs his privacy!"
It only earns him another whack on his head.
"Fine. Come along, you," he grumbles and leads the way out of the mess hall. Sasuke grabs a sandwich off of the plate on the nearest table and tries to walk out sedately behind Naruto, with limited success. He can feel his knees starting to give already. Why did he let himself get this exhausted? He is absolutely NOT
They make it to his designated sleeping space with minimum interruption, which for Naruto means being stopped at least twice by various crew members to say "hi" or be congratulated on his escape. At least it gives him the chance to munch his sandwich away. Finally they get to the right door before Sasuke makes a fool of himself all over the floor. He realizes he is already making enough of a fool of himself when he catches himself ogling said idiot's broad shoulders and toned ass that are walking ever so close in front of him, getting even closer as they stop in front of the door...
Sasuke trips and slams full-body into Naruto's back, grunting at the impact. He can smell musk, and sweat, and soap, and something he's not entirely sure of, but which has an extremely vivid effect on his nether regions. Naruto flattens himself to the wall, taking Sasuke's weight, a surprised 'oomph' escaping as he is winded by the blow. Sasuke is horrified when all he can feel is smooth, hard muscle beneath the thin jumpsuit. Not. Good. He must be more exhausted than he thought if he's getting turned on by the blond moron. The extremely fit blond moron... Shut up, libido!
He pushes away as fast as his shaking legs allow, muttering a quick 'sorry'.
"That's okay," Naruto tells him, still breathing harder than normal. "The code is 549800. The bathroom is just down the hall to the right there, D546, there's a shower sign on the door... Well, you can find your way around. If you need anything I'm right next door, okay? Okay. Goodnight then."
Sasuke grunts, barely able to focus on anything but Naruto's moving lips. He twitches uncomfortably and practically falls into his room when Naruto keys the door open.
"Are you alright?" Naruto wants to know, concerned with Sasuke's lack of balance.
"'M fine," Sasuke slurs, suddenly absolutely exhausted and unable to keep up his pretense. "Just need a shower and then I can sleep."
"Don't be ridiculous, you can't have a shower when you're this out of it, you'll slip and crack your head or something. Have one when you wake up in a few hours."
"But I'm disgusting," Sasuke points out; to his horror it comes out more like a child's whine.
Naruto smirks. "Well, I can't let you go in the shower alone in this condition, and I'm not going in there with you... unless you ask very nicely."
Sasuke recovers enough to glower darkly at him. "Fuck off," he tells him and passes out across the perfectly made bed.
Sasuke enters the dining hall the next morning smelling of cheap, probably stolen shampoo and high-quality, definitely stolen soap. Naruto is nowhere to be found, but he is the captain and there is no reason for him to be mingling with the crew when he could be captaining his ship.
The breakfast line is gone, but the crew's still mostly-present, seated at tables scattered about the room. Sasuke can't remember most of the crew's names--Nara Something, related to the clan head who had winked at Sasuke yesterday sat with the blonde... whatever-her-name-was, and a larger teen, both of whom are likely related to two more of the clan heads from yesterday.
Sasuke grabs a plate, placing an apple and a bagel on it. He glances over his shoulder, wondering if any of the crew will notice or care if he went into the kitchen to scavenge for a few tomatoes.
After a few seconds' debate with himself, Sasuke vetoes the idea. The apples aren't quite fresh, and tomatoes are a rarity. They would surely be in the food if there were any available.
Sasuke takes a seat at an empty table, away from the rest of the crew. Sakura takes a seat across from him, moments later. "Kakashi tells me you have a friend with nanomachines."
Sasuke looks up. He grunts his agreement, taking a bite out of his bagel.
"So. Where is this person?" Sakura asks.
Sasuke waits until he finishes chewing to reply, "Karin is currently about half a lightyear away. Zabuza and his companion said they would bring my crew back here. It will probably take a few days."
Sakura frowns, raising one eyebrow. "You... don't know much about Hoshii's ship work, do you?"
"What?" Sasuke takes another bite of his bagel, chewing slowly. "One half of a lightyear--if you've got a particularly good warp drive, it will take just under two days."
Sakura laughs. "We don't have any particularly good ships," she purrs. "We have customized ships, built by pirates like Zabuza and Haku who make their living by outrunning the rest of the universe. The estimated time for half a lightyear, round trip, is twelve hours. You've slept for eleven."
Naruto stumbles out of the second cold shower he's had to take today. One was due to hot, sweaty weapons practice with Kiba. The other was... not. It was that pretty bastard's fault. Pretty much everything had been for the past few days. Why did he have to go and be all... Sasuke-ish? He huffs a lungful of steamy air in irritation.
"Captain, your presence is required on deck," Jiraiya says, and Naruto instantly dislikes this new, more formal side of him that the Incident (capital "I") unlocked.
"On my way," he says loud enough for the microphone to pick his voice up twice over. The ship with Sasuke's crew must have arrived. "Hey, Jiraiya, how long until we reach the Whirlpool crash site?"
"About six hours, give or take a bit."
Right. So he only has to put up with the impostors for six hours at worst. He is curious, true, and they did sound awesome, but as the captain of a ship and having the well-being of ten crewmembers to look out for, it's a different bowl of ramen altogether.
He makes it to the bridge just as Kakashi is coming up as well, Iruka striding swiftly beside his slouching figure.
"Status?" Kakashi barks.
"Haku and Zabuza have landed and the passengers are disembarking into the cargo bay. There are five life signs at present; Haku and Zabuza are confirmed to be among them."
"All right," Kakashi addresses the gathered crew members. "We're going to go down there nice and calm, relieve the three strangers of their weapons, and offer them some tea. Understood?"
A chorus of grunts is his answer and everyone troops out of the door towards cargo bay. When they get there they pour out and circle the three unknown characters, taking in their bizarre appearances. Having Sakura on their ship has inured them to weird coloring, but the bright blue hair is a surprise even to those most used to the strangeness.
Naruto shoulders his way to the front. "I'm Uzumaki Naruto, captain of the Soragakure. Welcome to the ship. You'll understand, I hope, that we have to run some weapons checks on you before we allow you free run of the vessel. Sasuke, you have five minutes before we take them away for debriefing. Iruka--take away their weapons, please."
A handful of crew members stay nearby just in case something goes horribly awry, but only Sasuke and Naruto stand near enough to Sasuke's crew to be in any potential danger.
Iruka steps forward to the tallest one first. "Hello, and welcome to the Soragakure," he says pleasantly. "My name is Umino Iruka. Please hand over any weapons that may be in your possession. You may have them back after we have confirmed your loyalties; this is just a safety precaution."
The first crew member turns out his pockets. "I fight hand-to-hand, mostly," he explains. "My name is Juugo, nice to meet you."
Iruka shakes his hand, smiling back. He waves a metal detector over Juugo. "You're clear!"
The next stranger looks sullen. He scowls at Iruka. "Zabuza already got mine," he says.
"Mine, actually," Zabuza corrects, leaning on an even larger sword than the one from yesterday. The position of the drooping mask over his face suggests a wide grin.
Iruka swipes him with the metal detector before waving him on. The last is Karin, he presumes. "Hello," Iruka says, smiling. He always hates these procedures; they alienate strangers. On the other hand, it would be stupid not to do them, so he does.
Karin gives a forced smile. "I don't fight, if I can help it," she explains. "I'm a medic."
Iruka nods, waving the metal detector over her. It goes wild.
"Nanomachines," Sasuke explains.
Naruto grins. "She'll need to be strip-searched."
Karin sputters, before focusing on Sasuke with a dirty leer. "But, you trust Sasuke, right? He can give me a strip-search. Then I wouldn't feel embarrassed by exposing myself to strangers." She looks hopefully at Iruka, biting her lip and batting her eyelashes. The sheer range of emotion she goes through in so little time astounds Naruto.
"Procedure," Iruka says with a darkening blush, "dictates that a trusted, female crew member does the deed, so as not to risk sexual harassment. Sakura-chan?"
Karin looks immediately put-out. Sasuke appears almost relieved, but maybe that's just relief at the safe return of his crew members that Naruto is seeing.
Sakura steps forward, her cheeks pink like her hair. "Really?" she deadpans.
Iruka nods, unable to meet hers or Karin's eyes.
Naruto snickers. "We'll see you both in a minute, then, right?"
Sakura returns, even redder in the face than ten minutes ago. Naruto takes one look at her and bursts out laughing, bent in two and almost falling over with the effort. Sakura strides straight past him, knocking him in the ribs hard when she comes near. Naruto lets out a loud "oof" and falls over, still laughing his head off. "Does the carpet match the curtains?" he wheezes and disolves in guffaws again, rolling over on his back facing the ceiling. Sasuke watches him, amused and embarassed in equal parts though he's rather eat sand than show the latter.
Sakura stops. Everyone around her freezes, suddenly incredibly wary of her temper. She turns in place very, very slowly, to face Naruto again. The idiot is still giggling, completely unaware of the danger he's placing himself in. At the sudden absence of sound the laughter trails off bit by bit; he turns over on his stomach and looks at Sakura, who practically has steam coming off the top of her head. At the sight Naruto finally comes to his senses; he stares at her for a few more seconds before getting up ungracefully and dusting himself off with faked nonchalance. Sakura starts growling; Naruto takes that as his cue to leg it.
"No, no, please! Eheheh! You know I was only kidding, Sakura-chan! Help!"
Sakura runs after him with single-minded determination. The rest of the crew shake their heads at them, too used to this to even comment. Karin chooses this moment to come back in, adjusting several straps and buckles on her uniform.
"Er, sorry about that," Iruka scratches at the back of his head and sighs. "Shall we?" He leads them out of the cargo bay and into the mess hall to wait for Kakashi's orders and to arrange the interview places.
"I assure you, I am being entirely honest; I stay with Sasuke because he can reign me in, in case my bloodlust gets out of hand. I am fully loyal to him. If he is in turn loyal to you, they you have my word I will fight with you and abide by your laws."
"Thank you, Juugo." Kakashi stands and moves on to the next one. "Suigetsu. You know what? I'll spare you the recounter of everything you've done. My question to you is this: can you follow Hoshii's orders, or can you not?"
"Maaan, this is so boring. I hack into shit. That's what I do. You want a ship taken over--great. Just don't tell me I can't do this or I can't do that. I'm my own man."
Kakashi just looks at him.
Suigetsu blows out a puff of air. "Fine. Yes, I'll lake your orders--as long as you station me with Zabuza. There's a few tricks I want to blackmail him into teaching me. Plus, he has my sword and I'm not going to stay away from my baby."
"He says it's his sword."
"Hey, I looted it fair and square! If he's passed out in a bar, he can't complain that his stuff gets taken, now can he? Anyway, I'm gonna win it back from him."
Kakashi scratches his head and decides that's as good as they're going to get from Suigetsu. "Welcome to the crew," he says, not unkindly. "Go find Zabuza, bug him to brief you. Tell him you're part of his crew now. I'm sure he'll just love that!"
Suigetsu grins, showing teeth sharper than is strictly natural. "Fantastic!" he yelps and is gone in a swirl of blue and white. Kakashi smirks. He should get a most entertaining visit tonight.
For now--the last one, and the most valuable in his opinion.
"Karin," he says. "It is to our understanding that you have valuable medical knowledge."
Karin holds his gaze. She does not respond.
"The cost of staying on this ship will be for you to share this knowledge with our medic. Is this acceptable?"
Karin raises an eyebrow. "What, no bullshit about how I should obey Hoshii's orders?"
Kakashi smiles under his mask. "You'll be working with Sakura. I don't believe you'll have a choice."
Karin narrows her eyes. "Right."
At lunch, Sasuke's crew gathers around Sasuke. Naruto and Sakura take seats at the same table. There is a brief staring match between Sakura and Karin before the conversation picks up.
"So," Naruto says. "Working with Zabuza and Haku. How did that go?"
Suigetsu sneers. "Miserably."
"You know, when Zabuza starts getting handsy with Haku, that's just a method of keeping people away. He probably figures you'll give them their space." Naruto takes a sip of the canned... he's-not-sure-what juice. They're down to the questionably-flavored liquids; they need to make another hit for food and water, preferably soon.
Suigetsu frowns, clearly thinking this over. "So, if I ignore him...?"
"It'll get worse," Naruto admits. "But then he'll get annoyed and nine times out of ten, he'll give you what you want just to make you shut up. It's foolproof."
"How much longer?" Naruto yammers, terribly antsy and wanting to land already. The wreck is bound to have some canned food supplies left over, and he is desperate at this point. They are scheduled to come up to the Whirlpool crash site any minute now--Jiraiya is already slowing Soragakure down to intercept the orbit. The Power of Youth, and Naruto has absolutely no idea how someone could come up with such cringeworthy name and actually mean it, because Gai did, is already waiting at the rendezvous point just a couple hundred miles off the crashed ship.
"Jiraiya, set us down and open a communication channel to the... fuck, I'm not calling it that, I might vomit if I have to say it again; to Gai's ship."
"Comms open; go ahead, captain."
"We're setting down now, Gai, can you come in, too? Haku wants to have a go at your ship so you don't embarass us in front of the Suna crowd."
"Of course, Naruto! And may I say it is a singular pleasure to hear your youthful and energetic voice again? I have longed for many months for our next meet, when I could get the chance to quiz you on your always present exuberance--"
"Hello to you, too, Gai," Naruto sighs in defeat. No matter how many times he wants to go straight to business, it never quite works. "We'll have no more than three hours, tops. Okay? This wreck is not exactly in the most hidden of places; in fact, the wreckage is very close to intersecting with a major pirating route. There will be others apart from us after it. It's a good thing that we've got the fastest ships around, or someone would have already torn this place up ages ago. We've got to be in and out as quick as possible."
"Okay! It is just as you say, young captain, and may I say that it honors you to think so far ahead, and be so concerned for the safety of your crew--"
"Yes, Gai. See you in a minute, then." He turns around to face the others waiting for his signal.
"Everyone! Let's go! Three hours tops, remember? Iruka, would you brief the crew that's just now catching up? Then rip this ship apart, alright, guys?"
A thunderous roar greets his words; Naruto is always amazed that such an imposing sound can be projected by merely three mouths. Then again, if they are Kiba, Ino, and Choji, nothing can surprise him. Sai's wordless agreement is drowned out, but Sai doesn't count; the moment Sai starts yelling it'll be time to run from the end of the known universe.
The looting goes pretty much as planned. Each crew member takes a quadrant and an anti-grav, self-expanding backpack that can take up as much as 500 lb at a time, and goes at it with will. Naruto can hear the crashes from all the way across the ship. He takes a corner at random and comes across a sealed door that for some reason he finds irresistible. Busting it open, he is only a little disappointed to find it an old storage cupboard full with rich, perfectly preserved silks and satins. He shakes out a yukata at random and is delighted to find it in his favorite orange color, with a dark red obi and swirls etched into the sleeves and back. Even better--it is light and reassuringly solid at the same time. Naruto grins. Finders keepers is a fantastic law to have in pirating circles. He tucks it away for later. The rest go into the backpack along with some wood-and-gold writing boxes that he found in the previous room.
He takes a last look around the quarters and, satisfied, makes his way to the kitchens and pantry. "What have we got?" he yells out, almost salivating at the thought of something not peach-flavored.
"Loads, captain!" Kiba barks, victorious. "There's at least half a ton of supplies that we can avail ourselves of! I've already had half of them sent out with Konohamaru and Shino; this is the last lot."
"Excellent! We'll have ourselves a feast tonight, boys!"
He bounces back out of the door, heading in Haku's direction. He is curious to see how far Haku has got with ripping Gai's ship's engine apart and putting it back together so that it goes vroom in the distance. He's almost at the platform when a huge crash hits the wreck hard, shattering the stern and throwing the entire bulk forward by a few feet at least.
"Fucking hell, what now?" Naruto grouches as he runs towards the Soragakure. He knew this wreck was too juicy to go unnoticed! He catches a glimpse of a huge black hulk of a ship flashing past, and... are those red clouds painted on the sides? "Oh, shit," he swears, with feeling.
"Akatsuki is outside of the wreckage," Jiraiya booms over the speakers. He sends the same message over the communications channel so that Naruto, Chouji, Ino, Sai, and Kiba get the news, as well. "All hands prepare for an emergency combat situation. Engaging transporters. Clear the transporter pad for the captain and his companions."
"W-wait, Jiraiya, if you transport us, we won't be able to take the loot," Naruto says over his communicator.
"Safety of the crew and its captain over material possessions," Jiraiya responds. "Confirmation?"
Sakura stares at the intercom above her room.
"Sakura-chan, tell him no. I do not fucking confirm this. Take Ino, Kiba, and Chouji back, I'll grab the loot."
"Confirmation?" Jiraiya prompts.
"Confirmed," Sakura replies, biting her lip.
Seconds later, Naruto storms out of the transporter room and down the hall to the med lab. "Sakura!"
Sakura folds her arms. "Don't you start with me, Naruto--!" She scowls. "They're after you, and if Ino or Chouji or Kiba had volunteered, it would have been different, but--"
"Shit," Jiraiya's voice rings out. "Breach in security," he snaps. "The Power of Youth," and even though Jiraiya doesn't have a face, Naruto can hear him grimace at the name, "has just taken off for the Whirlpool wreckage."
Naruto pumps one fist into the air. "Who's piloting?"
"Uchiha Sasuke," Haku says over the radio. "As soon as he saw Akatsuki's ship, he went berserk. Shall Zabuza and I go after him?"
"He'll be fine," Naruto replies.
"No, I'm afraid he won't." Kakashi enters the room with his usual punctuality. "Prior to joining Orochimaru's crew, when Sasuke was very young--about eight years old--his brother murdered his entire clan."
"Who, Itachi? But he's on our side--Granny Tsunade--" Naruto protests.
"Yes, but Sasuke doesn't care whose side Itachi is on, he cares whether or not he is still alive." Kakashi pockets his copy of "Icha Icha Zero Gravity", revealing the severity of the situation. "He would much prefer that Itachi be dead by his own hands."
Sasuke clenches the battered ship's controls in a death grip, staring unseeingly at the landscape. He only realizes he is about to hit the open hangar space when he is a hundred meters off; he takes lightning-fast evasive maneuvers that, surprisingly, work--Haku may not look strong, but apparently he's a whizz with mechanics. He lands, light as a feather, just where he meant to. He unclips the seatbelts with practiced movements. He stands, taking out his phaser, setting it to kill. He drops the runway, which opens much more smoothly than those of Kirigakure's average ships, and exits. He takes a deep breath and tries to reign in the rage, the anger, the hurt and betrayal simmering through his veins instead of blood. This time--this time it's final.
A noise behind him makes him jump several feet in the air. Completely wired, he spins around, gun flashing in the sparse lights, only to come face-to-face with a pale Karin.
"What the hell are you doing here?" he snaps, nerves strained.
Karin shuffles her feet, looking at him from under her eyelashes. "You looked really grim when you left, Sasuke, I didn't want to leave you alone out here."
"This is personal, you have no part in it! I can't believe you fucking trailed me! This is a total invasion of my privacy! Go the fuck away!"
"Now, now, little brother, is that any way to treat a lady?"
Sasuke's neck almost snaps with the speed his head whips round. How did he never hear Itachi land? He hadn't realised the damned drug had worn off until this very moment, and that's really not like him. He glares at his older brother, his family, his vengeance, his everything. He hates him so much, so very much, that he can hardly speak. He chokes on Itachi's name, has to stop and swallow before he can force it out of his suddenly-too-dry mouth. The brothers lock their gazes; Sasuke feels like there should be lightning sizzling between the two of them. Sasuke lifts his phaser with a too-steady hand, points it between Itachi's eyes, and completely fails to shoot. He takes in the black-and-red robe, the deep valleys etched into his face, his relaxed stance, his hands hanging by his sides and fights the urge to cry, and scream, and just ask him, why?
"You never told me you had a brother, Sasuke!" Karin leers, sashays over to where Itachi is standing, hips swaying from side to side. She shakes her long pink hair over her shoulder and puffs up her chest so that her almost nonexistant breasts jut out further. She stops right in front of him and trails a hand over his arm and higher on his shoulder. Itachi looks at her, blinks, turns to Sasuke again with a delicately-raised eyebrow that translates to a clear what the hell? marring his typically-reserved face. Sasuke wants to smack his palm to his forehead, but that might result in shooting himself--he settles for rolling his eyes instead, grimacing at Itachi and Karin.
Itachi seems to shudder and Karin's hand slides off of him like water. She seems taken aback, but takes the opportunity to circle him and ogle his toned backside. Sasuke would laugh himself hoarse at the look on Itachi's face if he wasn't too busy fuming. "Karin, get away from him! For fuck's sake, move out of the way, I'm trying to kill him!"
"Have you not stopped deluding yourself, little brother? You could never kill me if I didn't let you. Now, let's be serious. We hear that you are traveling with some very interesting companions these days. Tell me about Uzumaki Naruto."
"What makes you think I would tell you anything about Naruto?"
"'Naruto'? That sounds like first-name basis. You two aren't getting close are you?" Itachi says in the teasing way only an older brother can.
Sasuke's face gains a delicate pink tinge across his cheekbones; Itachi's eyes fasten on it and he grins, like a spider at a fly. "Interesting," he purrs.
Sasuke raises the gun again, leveling it at Itachi's face with no hesitation. "Karin, get back," he instructs.
Karin leaps back at his words, not questioning the sudden darkening of his facial expression. That's why he never talks about his brother, she decides. If that's how Sasuke feels about Itachi, she's not sure she wants to see him much more, either. A pretty face doesn't make up for whatever he must have done to Sasuke.
Sasuke fires.
The shot goes cleanly through Itachi's head; the phaser ripping through Itachi's skull like--
That's not Itachi's skull, Karin realizes. The person in front of her flickers for a moment, like static on a radio, complete with a softfsssszht noise. It's not Itachi anymore, it's a blond man, hair slicked back. Sasuke sneers. "Where is Itachi?"
The blond reaches up to wipe away a drop of blood rolling down his nose, only managing to smear it. "Fucked if I know. We suspect he has defected. His partner's gone, too, though, and we know Kisame is loyal," the man coos.
Sasuke's mind reels, flickering over memories of 'Wanted' posters and signs. Orochimaru had a whole wall for the Akatsuki ones. "Hidan," he says at last.
"Oh, look at that, I'm fucking famous," Hidan replies.
Karin backs up farther. This man just took a head shot. She wants no part of being close to someone like that.
"But enough about me--let's talk about Naruto. Captain of the Soragakure, a former resident of Konoha, ex-lover of Gaara of the Desert. We know a goddamn lot about him, but what I really want to know is how the fuck to get him out here. He's got a program inside of him," Hidan taps his temples, "and we want a copy of it."
Sasuke widens the radius of his phaser's beam as Karin steps as far away from Hidan as she can get without falling off the platform. He fires again, no remorse. He'd prefer not to kill if he can help it, but--
Hidan coughs up blood as the hole in his torso closes. "Damn, what the hell was that for? You know, shooting people leads to killing people, and killing people leads to hell, unless you're with the right religion, of course." Hidan grins, blood covering his teeth.
Karin slams a large hunk of metal into the back of his head. He falls unconscious. "Should we take him back to the ship?"
Sasuke shakes his head, heading for Akatsuki's shuttle.
"Sasuke," Karin tries, receiving no visible response.
Over their communicators, static fizzles.
"Goddamn it, I can't reach him," Naruto growls in despair. He has no idea if the idiot is even still alive. Karin seems to have slipped out with him as well; Jiraiya can't reach either of them through the communicators Sasuke stole from Haku and Zabuza.
"We should attack," Kakashi says. "That, or run for the hills."
"We fire on that ship, they're going to fire right back at us. In fact, I'm amazed that they haven't already flamed us to ash," Jiraiya opines. "You prepared for that option?"
"Damn it, we have to do something! Not to mention that the loot is still down there... Hey! Maybe I could go back down there, fetch the stuff and collect Sasuke while I'm at it--"
"NO!" Sakura and Iruka glare at him; Kakashi looks bored in a I'mma break your neck if you make as much as a move for the cargo bay kind of way, and Sai just looks bored.
The comms crackle. "Uchiha to Uzumaki. Uzumaki, do you read?"
"Oi! Where the hell are you? Get back on this ship right now!"
"Naruto, two things. One, since when have I taken orders from you, or anyone? And two, I can't come back just yet. Akatsuki are after you. Repeat, Akatsuki's target is you. Do not leave the ship! I'll be back in a bit, I'm just going to break their plasma boosters so they can't follow. Over and out!"
"No, wait! Wait, goddamn it!" Naruto hits the console hard enough to rattle the screen. "That fucking prick! When I get my hands on him..."
"Naruto! Do not worry yourself, I am here! How can I assist you in your worthy endeavor--"
"Not now, Gai! Unless you have a way to get my loot back on board, get Princess to stop acting like an absolute moron and return to the ship so that we can escape!"
"I may have a solution to at least one of those problems, my youthful companion! Fear not! You can leave the retrieval of the needed goods to me! Teleport me and my beloved student Lee back onto the Whirlpool wreck and we shall take care of the supplies shortage presently!"
"That's actually--yeah. Thanks, Gai." Naruto grins, feeling closer to stable ground again. "Jiraiya--you heard the man. Do it. Gai, make sure you report on the situation when you're down there and have visuals."
Gai salutes, Lee eagerly following suit. They are beamed down; seconds later communications between Gai and the Soragakure are established. So it's just Sasuke's comm that is malfunctioning. Naruto wonders for a moment what could set off a localised frequency blocker before deciding the bastard is probably doing it himself, so that Naruto will be denied the pleasure of yelling himself hoarse at him.
"Supplies and valuables are untouched on the ground. No sight of Sasuke or Karin. One unconscious body on the ground, dressed in Akatsuki gear; it is not Uchiha Itachi. Visuals confirm a blond man who has been shot several times. Awaiting instructions--should we dispose of him?" Gai says, as utterly professional as he usually is when deployed in the field.
Naruto considers for less than two seconds. "Throw him out into space, then pick up the goods and get your asses back here! I don't want to risk it. We'll have to go back for Sasuke once he deigns to let us know his position."
"Copy, Captain Uzumaki. Over and out!"
Twelve minutes later Gai and Lee are back, and a body can be seen drifting in orbit of the crash site. "It won't be enough, you know," Jiraiya says darkly. "Some of those bastards have nanobytes in their blood, filtering through the discarded oxygen and keeping their lungs inflated and blood-supplied. I'm not even sure if the vacuum would be enough to kill him."
"Yeah, well, it's the best we've got for now," Naruto huffs. At least the loot is safely on board. Now, if only Princess would get his ass in gear and call in so they can pick him up and leave the wreckage! He knew it was way too close to the pirate trading routes to be safe!
"Everyone, report your status!" he orders, for something to keep him occupied and stop him storming over the Akatsuki ship and blowing it up.
"Kiba, Ino, Shikamaru, Shino, Chouji, all present in cargo deck storing away the loot!"
"Konohamaru, assisting Sakura in sick bay with Juugo and Suigetsu's mandatory check-ups!"
"Haku, upgrading the emergency pods!"
"Zabuza, in the weapons deck with Gai and Lee!"
The rest of them are in the room with him. Everyone present and correct, except for that--that--augh!
"I'm gonna kill him! What's he doing over there anyway? And where's his brother? Would you send a lackey to do your job if it was your own brother who wanted to kill you very dead?"
Sai says nothing, smiling politely and vacantly at him as he flails around the bridge, cursing viciously at Uchihas and their ancestors.
Sasuke, contrary to what Naruto would say given the two days he's been getting to know him, is actually quite stealthy. Karin is not as stealthy, but Sasuke, in his limitless genius, has come up with a solution for that, as well. He moves forward, incapacitates another Akatsuki member, then turns around and waves Karin over.
Unfortunately, someone should have told him that if it seems too easy to infiltrate the ship of a crew of pirates wanted by every colony, country, world, and small gathering of people coming together just for the purpose of proclaiming the undying value of youth, knitting, or other inane things--it probably is.
If Naruto had been on board, he would have snapped "Who's the dumbass now, princess?" after deflecting the carefully aimed tranquilizer. As it stands, Naruto was not allowed to leave the Soragakure, Karin is still two rooms and a hallway away, and the tranq lands square in Sasuke's backside.
Within seconds, everything goes black. Akatsuki doesn't hold back on their sedatives.
"Should we send someone to check on him, captain?" Lee asks, leaning over the console.
Juugo enters the room. "I volunteer. Karin and Sasuke have been gone for too long without contact."
"Let them rot," Suigetsu replies, leaning on Zabuza's sword like he owns it again. "Sasuke will come back when he wants to, and not before. Like he cares if we're worried."
"I apologize for the interruption, but perhaps your crew should be acting with more haste...?" comes from the speakers. Only trouble is, that's certainly not Jiraiya's voice.
"Who the fuck is that?" Naruto yells, spinning round to face the screen. An image is slowly emerging from the snowflakes of no transmission. Dark hair, dark eyes, deep valleys running down the blank face, Akatsuki robe... "Sasuke?" Naruto asks tentatively.
"No," Kakashi fills in grimly. "Hello, Itachi. It's been a while."
"I-Itachi? Sasuke's homicidal brother? I thought Sasuke went over to the Akatsuki ship to kill him!"
"He did. Unfortunately, my foolish little brother did not consider the possibility that I might no longer be on it."
"Yeah, the little shit's far too impulsive to be called an Uchiha." There's a face emerging from the background, a pale, fishy-looking face with weird sunken eyes and too-sharp teeth.
"What now? Oh, hey, any relation to Zabuza?" Naruto wonders, ever the ice-breaker.
"Don't talk to me about that failure! He's an embarrassment," the shark-toothed stranger snaps.
"Kisame," Itachi murmurs and Kisame is instantly silent, if still pouting. "You would be Naruto, I presume. You look just like Minato. You have Kushina's face, though," and there's something in his voice that makes Naruto's heart pound. He must have known them, Naruto realizes; nobody speaks of them like that unless they had been close to them. Naruto opens his mouth to ask about this, but Itachi cuts him off.
"No time for foolish gaping. The vital signs monitors in Sasuke's eyes are reacting; something has gone wrong, he appears to be unconscious. You must get on that ship and retrieve him; he won't be able to make it out alone. If it involves Deidara, it's something explosive. Go over there now. I will distract them and provide you with an opening."
"Wait, wait, wait. Sasuke's eyes? What the fuck? Anyway, why are you telling us this? Doesn't he want you dead? And how the hell did you hack into my ship?"
"Jiraiya-sama is getting too confident in his old age; it was much too easy. After all, I know his weaknesses."
"Well, un-hack him for fuck's sake, I can't take off without him. Hell, if I'd known how much trouble the Princess would get into, I never would have rescued him from that ship in the first place. What are you waiting for? Hurry! I need a diversion now," he shouts, already racing for the transportation pads.
"I think I like him, even if he is entirely too loud," Kisame muses as the picture starts to fade. Kakashi can't be sure, but he thinks he may have seen Itachi smile before murmuring an affirmative.
Naruto hears none of this as he accelerates. He hears footsteps pounding to his left and sees Juugo racing alonside him. "I'm coming, too," he says, and Naruto already knows not to argue with that tone. Emerging into the cargo bay, he legs it to the nearest shuttle, which happens to be Gai's ship. Fuck, he's damned if he's using the usual call sign! He thunders on board anyway; it's up-to-scratch at last since Haku's been tinkering with it for over three hours already. Juugo straps in next to him; he switches on the engines and is about to take off when he hears a faint, "Wait for me, damnit!" and a panting Suigetsu staggers up the runway at the last moment.
"I thought you weren't coming," Naruto taunts; Suigetsu grimaces.
"And miss all the fighting? Like hell." He rubs along the sheathed blade of Zabuza's sword lovingly. "What?" he says at Naruto's raised eyebrows. "I borrowed it."
"Does Zabuza know you 'borrowed' it?"
"He will eventually," Suigetsu grins a very toothy grin, glowing with satisfaction.
Naruto shakes his head and takes off at last. He thinks he sees a flash over at Akatsuki's ship; seconds later it's there again. "Are they shooting at it? Damnit, Sasuke's still on board that thing!" He fiddles with the comms. "Oi! Blond Ambition to Arrogant Bastard, your brother's still on that ship you're trying to shoot out of the sky!" he yells into the ether, with no hope of reply. He almost falls out of his seat when he gets one.
"Then you'd better hurry. You seem very concerned about my brother."
"Asshole!" Naruto bellows, but pumps up the accelerator. They zoom towards the already flaming ship, barely hitting the open gateway and skidding to a stop inside through the molecule-thin forcefield keeping the pressurised environment intact. The runway drops and the three peek out to see if they have been noticed, which, considering the noise their landing made, should be a resounding 'yes'. The comm fizzles static and Itachi's voice stops Naruto just as he's about to jump out.
"Take the scanner with you. I'm transferring over the signal from Sasuke's eyes. There are seventeen life forces on my screen, and since we know that two of them are Sasuke and his companion, that makes fifteen Akatsuki members to keep a lookout for. Do not go in overconfident or under-prepared."
Naruto bristles. "You are a royal pain in the ass, you know that? I can definitely see the family resemblance. You just keep distracting them, I'll do your job for you."
"Don't strain yourself," Itachi deadpans, and is gone.
"Right. Let's go. We have ourselves a Princess to save." I wonder if he'd throw himself at my feet in gratitude? Naruto muses, and then remembers whom he's thinking about, and snorts. Maybe Sasuke'll kiss him in thanks for the daring rescue while he's at it, he snarks to himself. Yeah, and Chouji will go on a diet.
"Fire is coming from a stray Alliance ship; all probability points to a hijacking," Konan reports, her fingers dancing over the controls of the ship. Their current ship, Hungry Ghost, is taking more fire than it can handle, but Nagato had planned for this. Konan flips the release on Hungry Ghost's escape hatch, steering the smaller ship into space under stealth mode.
"Why aren't we firing back at those traitors?" Deidara snaps. "Let me have the controls, c'mon, I'm a dead shot, I can take them out with minimal ammo!"
"Hush, Deidara," Nagato hisses. "Kisame's allegiances are still unknown."
"Shark-san?" Tobi coos. "But he is so cool! Itachi-san, too! Betrayal breaks Tobi's heart!"
"How did Itachi know that we have Sasuke?" Zetsu asks. He twitches, his voice deepening as he answers himself, "He probably tracks the brat. Sasuke is his precious little brother."
"We've left a few surprises behind for the traitor and the Uchiha. We're not going to make it easy for them," Nagato states, fiddling with the remote controls for Hungry Ghost.
"Oooh, you've left presents?" Tobi squeals.
"Close enough," Deidara smirks as explosions start going off in the distance. The firing from the hijacked vessel seems to have tapered off, and Konan concludes that the traitor must have swiped some of their software on his way out of the organization--their distinctive signatures have no other way of being spotted than with the quantum frequency detector, she'd made sure of that. Still, she's inclined to thing of this outcome as successful--one Uchiha down, the other on his way there if the clones have anything to say about it. And the ninth piece of the code so very close to their grasp! She hopes Nagato knows what he's doing. They'll never live it down if this plan fails.
Naruto creeps against the wall, Juugo and Suigetsu watching his back and side. The firing from the outside has stopped. Naruto is sure this means something, but with Itachi it's anyone's guess what exactly. He wishes for he umpteenth time that he had the presence of mind to grab the communicator, but he had wanted radio silence to stave off detection. Maybe everyone has a point when they say he doesn't think things through too well before charging.
Nah, he thinks. He's awesome. He can wing it.
A sixth sense tells him to duck; since it has saved his life more times than he can count, he listens to it. He barely dodges a sedative dart aimed at his shoulder. "Juugo! Suigetsu! Heads-up!" he shouts--no sense in staying silent any longer. Suigetsu jumps in front of him, sword drawn and ready. He deflects a second dart with his blade, hissing, "They're coming from up ahead on the right. On three. One... two... th--"
Naruto sprints up to the corner, Suigetsu's swearing ringing in his ears. He turns it at speed, already in a battle stance. He lands a flying kick at the figure waiting there for him, obviously taking it by surprise and sending it flying, smashing the tranquiliser gun against the wall. He takes quick note of the guy, clocking in the flaming orange hair, the piercings, the weird purple eyes staring at him in shock before he knocks him out with a well-placed hit to the side of his head.
"Clear," he yells and checks the signal from Sasuke's life signs monitor. Conveniently, it's coming from straight ahead and a little on the left. He rushes forward, keeping an eye (and a feel) out for more interference. He almost jumps out of his skin when the ship's communications crackle with static, and Itachi's voice rumbles out.
"Uzumaki, hurry! Most of the heat signals have abandoned ship; I count nine left, one down. I have to break communications; I'm being hacked. I am leaving this to you. Do not fail." And he's gone, just like that.
"You guys hear that? Eight more hostiles somewhere ahead. Watch your step!"
Sasuke is awoken by movement. He is unceremoniously slung across someone's shoulders again. After a moment, he recognizes the orange longcoat as Naruto's. He makes a mental note to never admit to being able to identify Naruto by ass alone.
They pass a body--orange hair, and facial piercings, very distinctive. There is no blood, just a snapped neck. Juugo's work, probably. There is a clang and a shot in the distance. "FUCK," Suigetsu wails, then another clang. Lovely.
"Hurk," Sasuke tries to push himself off of Naruto's shoulder. "I'm awake, dumbass, let me down."
"No can do--we're on the move and you're still not fully recovered. Where is Karin?"
"No idea--didn't we just pass that body a minute ago?" The one on the floor has a phaser burn through the chest. There is a puddle of blood under him.
Naruto takes a moment to reply between heavy breaths, "Yeah. Clones."
Naruto rounds a corner. Sasuke can see Juugo in the opposite direction, fighting... the same person Sasuke saw on the floor. Twice. "How many of him are there?"
Naruto shrugs under Sasuke. Fuck, but that's uncomfortable, Sasuke thinks as Naruto's shoulder digs into his hips. "There were eight."
Eventually they make their way down the corridor after counting six clones down. Sasuke is only just now becoming aware enough to realise they are one crew member down. He's right in time, too--Naruto is striding swiftly, Sasuke's weight bouncing over his shoulder.
"We can'- can't leave yet, Karin is sti--still missing. This i--is ridiculous. Put me down, you us--useless moron!"
Sasuke regrets his words when he is unceremoniously dumped on the floor, Naruto towering over him. Sasuke scowls, narrowing his eyes vindictively. He is so getting Naruto back for this. Ungracefully, he makes his way to standing position.
"Fine, Princess. Know how to locate her? Because seems to me we're still two clones down from the full set and I don't fancy her chances against them, they are quite inventive for a bunch of cells."
"You underestimate Karin." The defence comes from the most unlikely source--Suigetsu continues while cleaning up his sword, which he has been putting to very good use. "She's a whiny bitch, but even one of her nanobots in your bloodstream and you'll die in screaming agony with no chance of survival."
He's not wrong - when they eventually stumble on Karin's location using the trial-and-error search method (which essentially means sticking their heads through every door they come up to) the remaining two clones are lying in pools of cooling blood and Karin is healing a long gash in her arm. The bloody laser-edged knife at her belt suggests it's self-inflicted. "What took you idiots so long?" she bitches, immediately raising Suigetsu's hackles when she bats her eyelashes at Sasuke. "Are you alright, Sasuke? Why don't you take off your shirt so I can evaluate your injuries?" she leers.
"Get off your lazy ass, we have to get moving. We ought to have been gone hours ago, but we had to look for your bloated corpse before Sasuke would count you down."
Suigetsu's dig backfires when Karin drapes all over Sasuke, cooing her appreciation very loudly.
Sasuke sidesteps her with an ease that results in Karin falling off him to sprawl on the floor in an undignified heap.
"We have to go. We don't have time for games." Naruto stands a little way off. He is slightly disturbed by his newly discovered desire to smash Karin's nose in when she paws at Sasuke's chest. He shakes his head in resignation and walks off. It's not even ten seconds later before the loud bickering follows him like a bad smell. They make it onto the ship with no further mishaps, bar a couple of charges going off in the distance and completely frying the comm network and the data stores. Suigetsu is livid and almost gets his left hand blown off before Sasuke drags him amongst flailing protests off the electronics panel and on board the shuttle.
"Shut up, all of you!" Naruto finally yells after what feels like hours of circular arguments. "I've had enough--I'm landing us on Sora-chan, and we're getting the fuck out of this quadrant, are we clear? We got the loot we wanted in the first place, so we're done here. Read my lips: I do not care that your brother is insane, has defected from Akatsuki and seems to be on our side now. You two sort out your shit on your own time!"
It's the longest rant that the four have heard coming from Naruto, and they are slightly taken aback by the volume, if not the content. Sasuke scowls so hard that his eyes almost close as they bore into the back of Naruto's neck, but Naruto is unmoved. He's said his piece; he's truly reached his crap-per-day limit for the time being. They are going to go fetch Gaara and take care of this Kyuubi shit once and for all so he can go home and gorge himself on blessed ramen in peace, with no innuendo from strange villains, no fucking dark-haired scowling Princess to give him a hard-on he does not want nor need, no new crew members crawling out from the woodwork at every corner. Just no.
Naruto has no idea why the hell he's so annoyed; he thinks there's probably a good chance it's Karin's incessant passes at Sasuke and Suigetsu's resulting sulking. And not a single word of thanks for saving both their asses--not that he needs thanks, but it's just good manners! If they don't shut the fuck up soon, someone's going to get it, and good, he decides.
Naruto, along with Sasuke's team, is ushered into the med lab as soon as they return to the Soragakure.
"Sakura-chaaaaan," he wails. "I'm fine! This is completely unnecessary."
Sakura removes a tiny tracking device from where it has tried to burrow into his shoulder.
"Ow! What was that for?"
She holds up the tracker with an I-told-you-so look. "Konohamaru-kun, please check Suigetsu and Juugo."
Konohamaru nods, moving to Suigetsu's side.
Sakura makes her way to Karin in the tiny med-lab room, but is dismissed. "Nanites already cannibalized it," Karin says. She continues to file her nails, ignoring Sakura.
Sakura throws her an evil look, but moves on. She needs to get all she can from this one before she murders her from sheer irritation. Konohamaru grunts as he tugs out another tracking device trying to burrow its way into Juugo's shoulder. Suigetsu rolls his eyes, reaches into his sleeve and removes a jack, which he then proceeds to jam into his arm. Sakura's eyebrows disappear under her fringe when she sees the implant Suigetsu has just violated with the copper metal plug. He grunts in discomfort, but there's a satisfied smile on his face, too.
"What?" he wonders when he sees the way Sakura's looking at him. "Hacker, remember? This is just a tiny implant; you should see my legs!"
"I did see your legs, and there was nothing there!"
"Oh, yeah, camouflage shimmer, I forgot. Look, you know the hackers' motto, 'always prepared'? Well, I am. I have a bunch of programming inside me; much easier to download into ships' computers, and much faster, too--time is always of the essence when you're about to get blown to bits."
"Huh," Sakura allows, but secretly knows he has a point. "See, Naruto? Not everyone freaks out about a bit of coding inside them!"
Naruto grunts, unimpressed. "I know that! Remember what Jiraiya was like by the end of it? More machine than human. I can't even remember if he still had even one of his own limbs left before he transferred himself to full-time program. That's not the point! No program ever managed to take him over, make him lose control!"
Suigetsu snorts. "You just have to learn to control it, if that's the case. I can teach you. Even Jiraiya could teach you, and Kakashi knows a thing or two about programming as well. I'm amazed neither of them have trained you on it yet."
Naruto bristles. "Jiraiya! Is that true? WHY THE HELL DIDN'T YOU SAY SO IN THE FIRST PLACE?"
Jiraiya clears his throat nervously over the speakers, a habit left over from his days of being human. "Er. I sort of wanted to let Tsunade explain, first."
"But she didn't! I still have no fucking idea what the hell this thing is! Look, I think it's time we had a talk, just you, me, and Kakashi. Okay?"
Sakura hits him. "Oi! Don't even for a second think you're going to exclude me! I have a right to know what fucked up thing is going on with my Captain!"
Naruto looks at her, eyes slightly shiny from the sting of the hit. "Sakura-chan! You've never called me 'captain' before!" he wibbles.
Sakura blushes. "Yes, well. Shut up."
Jiraiya sighs. "Fine. Meet on the bridge in half an hour. I'll let Kakashi know."
"Finally! I want some answers, and it's about damn time I got them."
"You agreed to this?" Kakashi asks, voice neutral.
"I had to. Look, he has a right to know the facts. It's his body. And it was his dad who made the choice in the first place."
"Hey, I'm all for it. Just thought I'd check you were good to go ahead and tell him."
"I'm standing right here."
"Kinda hard to miss you, kid."
"Hey! I resent that!"
"Look, do you want to know all this or not?"
Naruto vibrates with impatience in his chair. "Yes! Get on with it!"
Jiraiya sighs in exasperation; if he was still human he'd have been rolling his eyes, Sakura was sure. "Okay. I'll start at the beginning, shall I? Your dad, Namikaze 'Yellow Flash' Minato was one of Konoha's best-known and best-loved leaders. He had a strict code of conduct, placing loyalty to Konoha and its people above any other search for power. He was fiercely protective of the well-being of the Konoha citizens; so, he clashed quite a lot with the Elders, who were all about having a combat power advantage.
"Then, one day a horrifying virus found its way into the Konoha mainframe. The oxygen supply failed when the virus hacked into it. The external shields were taken down, some of the doors were opened... there was just so much damage. So many deaths. Minato went to Sarutobi-sensei, who used to be Konoha's leader before Minato took over. He said the virus needed to be contained or it would wipe out the entire population. He said he'd worked out a way to do it, but it meant sacrificing one of the children to save the village. He trapped the virus in a harddrive and implanted it into your spine, creating a cyborg bone structure to put the data inside. He marked its position by the seal on your belly. He knew that the virus was extremely powerful, and could do incredible things for the person who controlled it."
Naruto lifts his shirt, but his bare stomach is flat and unmarked. Sasuke stares at it; then, with some effort, makes himself look away.
"It only appears when the program is active. It's the reason why you have your preternatural reflexes and awareness, Naruto. The virus program analyzes the surroundings, down to the smallest nanoparticles, and feeds the info back into your neural cortex. The only person able to fool the virus is someone with a certan type of cyborg eyes. Your father was very, very smart and forward-thinking. To make sure you would be protected from the side-effects of the virus being inside you, he got together with Uchiha Fugaku, Sasuke's father and Konoha's resident cybernetic geneticist, and created the Sharingan eye implant. It is genetically unique in that only the Uchiha clan can operate it to its full potential. He then surgically replaced the eyes of the entire Uchiha clan with the new implant."
"That's why you reacted so violently to looking into Sasuke's eyes. They are designed to seek out the virus program and activate it," Kakashi adds in a soft voice. "The program can only ever be fully extracted if a Sharingan user is present at the time, so that the Sharingan program can trip the lockdown code Minato-sensei placed on it."
"So... it was my dad who put that thing in me?"
"Yes. So that you could save the village he loved so much. And because he knew you would find it useful someday, and it would keep you safe despite all the people who want control over the program."
"But--that happened in Konoha, right? So how come we live in Hoshiigakure now?"
"You know the Elders?" At Naruto's affirmative nod, Jiraiya snorts bitterly. "They were supposed to protect you, as per Minato's instructions. Hawking knows Tsunade and I tried, but they wanted you locked up and held in a stasis field until they'd found a way to extract the program. Then Orochimaru tried to abduct you to get hold of it, and things got really out of hand. Danzou declared Martial Law in Konoha and tried to claim you for the arsenal. Everyone had had enough by that point. Your mother packed a few bags, took you and came to us, begging us to help her smuggle you out of Konoha. Uchiha Fugaku happened to be with us at the time when she arrived; he agreed to take the entire Uchiha clan and go into hiding with us.
"It was inevitable that Danzou would catch wind of this plan. That's where Itachi comes in. Danzou ordered the extermination of the Uchiha clan, thinking that the Sharingan eyes were the only way to leash in the virus. Itachi, loyal to Konoha to the last and worried that the virus might well fall into the wrong hands with the Uchiha clan leaving and scattering, complied. We all thought the entire clan extinct, save for Itachi. We thought Sasuke to be dead, too, although we never found his body and Kakashi remained certain that he was still alive. Now it looks like Orochimaru kidnapped Sasuke and took off with him, since he, too, disappeared around that time.
"Anyway, the Heads of the Five clans were furious. We made plans to leave as soon as possible. One day all of us just got up and took off, about two hundred souls with four S-class ships at our disposal. We flew in evasive maneuvers while the Hoshiigakure was built in between fleeing. What we didn't know was that the two Elders had decided to come with us. A small shuttle with two passengers went virtually unnoticed beside the larger ships. It wasn't until we all landed and took our stations on Hoshii that they came out, declaring they were joining us officially. We were labeled pirates and outlaws for our defection; Hoshii became our own Village Hidden in the Stars. Meanwhile, Danzou formed the Alliance with the other five Hidden Villages, which was aimed at destroying us and Akatsuki."
A contemplative silence falls over the bridge. The younger crew members had never really thought about why they live on Hoshiigakure, only that they do.
Naruto breaks the silence, as is his habit. "What happened to my mum?"
Kakashi's eye is pained and filled with guilt. "She was killed by assassins from Danzou's Root ANBU Division. I was supposed to protect her, I promised Minato-sensei I would. But you were ill, and I'd taken you to Soragakure to ask Jiraiya to check what was wrong with you, and she was alone in the house when they came for you. She wouldn't tell them where you were, so they killed her. I'm sorry."
Naruto sits there looking crushed and and seriously pissed off, a combination only he can pull off. "It all comes back to that bastard Danzou. My dad, my mum, Sasuke's entire clan... We're going to have to do something about him. And you are going to help me do it. For starters, what the hell has Gaara to do with all this?"
"Ah. We get to the hard part. Okay. So, it turns out this virus was not alone. It was a part of a huge program, one so big that it couldn't be contained in a single vessel. So, nine parts of it were broken off and placed in hosts much like yourself, but every host has a different method of storing the data. Gaara was one of those hosts, but his father never bothered with placing a failsafe, or implanting the data in a way that extraction keeps the host alive. Remember when he got kidnapped and you went to help? And Chiyo-sama replaced his cyborg heart with her own? The program was sealed inside Gaara's heart. Gaara was supposed to have died when the virus was extracted."
Naruto clenches his fists. He's starting to hate this virus more and more with every passing moment.
"You have the largest chunk, the Kyuubi." Naruto flinches, finally understanding all the jibes he has received from the Elders over the years. "That's why Akatsuki are after you. They want to collect all the chunks back at the mainframe, which is where the tenth piece remains. And obviously they need an Uchiha, so they want Sasuke now that Itachi has defected from their organization. What they don't know is that Itachi has been a double agent all this time, working with us and feeding us information on Akatsuki. He finally left them only a couple of days ago when he clocked Sasuke being rescued by us.
"Unfortunately, from Itachi's information, the only two pieces of the program remaining free are you and the eigth biggest chunk. Akatsuki have already harvested the rest of them, killing their hosts. So, our objective is to get to the mainframe before Akatsuki can get hold of us, download your part of the program into it and take control."
"What does the machine do?" Sasuke asks.
"Nobody knows. The nine viral pieces of it are extremely hostile and agressive; we can only imagine what the complete program does. What we do know is that we absolutely have to keep it out of Akatsuki hands by any means necesary."
"Right then," Naruto says, flexing his fingers and stretching. He's back to his boundless-energy-self, and everyone breathes a sigh of relief. "Here's the plan. We go fetch Gaara, come up with a way to sidetrack Akatsuki while we sneak our way to the mainframe, download the data and you guys teach me to control it! It's a foolproof plan!"
Sakura rolls her eyes. "Unfortunately, it doesn't look to be a Naruto-proof one."
"Did you hit your head as a child?" Sasuke asks. "You can't even control the current program. Judging by size alone, you're not going to be able to integrate with it like Suigetsu, or Kakashi's lightning glove. You have to override it with your will without crushing it. It's a delicate process. That's why this ship is legendary--not because you're an intergalactic amazing pirate captain, but because Jiraiya, who was an intergalactic amazing pirate captain, is the mind of the ship. Soragakure still functions like she should, yet you have a sentient, formerly-human mind in there with her, controlling the whole thing. You do realize that Soragakure is not just the only ship with those capabilities in the galaxy, but the only ship with those capabilities ever, right?"
Naruto blinks. It's the most Sasuke has said since he was dragged onto the ship. "What?" He cocks his head. "So, if Jiraiya can do it, I can do it," he confirms.
"Yes, Naruto," Kakashi agrees smoothly. "That is exactly what he was saying."
Naruto nods. "Good! When do we start?"
Sakura puts her face gently into the palm of her hand, and sighs.
Onwards to Part Three!
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Date: 2011-02-05 08:20 pm (UTC)also, this line I enjoyed particularly:
Naruto lifts his shirt, but his bare stomach is flat and unmarked. Sasuke stares at it; then, with some effort, makes himself look away.
especially in the middle of such a tense scene XD.
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Date: 2011-02-05 08:28 pm (UTC)Also, thank you, chickie! You know how I like pretty boys and other boys that fancy them rotten! XP
Also -- YOUR LAYOUT IS COMPLETELY GORGEOUS. I actually looked at that myself, but I wanted something with a wide comment space to minimise scrolling, since I know it drives me to distraction sometimes. But it suits you completely! The colours are delicious, and the whole feel of it is so playful and fresh! ♥